Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger June 2007 Edition

TIP OF MY HAT TO iTUNES
For finally letting me get some music that's not locked out of every other program. Hurry up and finish the library please! Copyrights are for pussies. Except for my books. Then copyright rocks.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO OUR JUSTICE SYSTEM
Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that Paris Hilton and Scooter Libby don't belong in jail. But while they're there, who are we going to be pissed off at for acting like total buffons and getting away with everything? It takes away the righteous indignation.
TIP OF MY HAT TO THE LAUGH FACTORY
For enslaving Jon Lovitz in Hollywood and spinning it as a good thing, when he got his record breaking contract that means he will perform every Wednesday night there until he dies.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO ABC
I don't want to wait until December for the latest seasons of Lost and Grey's Anatomy to come out on DVD. And the price increase? What were you thinking???
TIP OF MY HAT TO MERCURY
Despite recent worries, it turns out you haven't been poising us lately. Good for you.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO NON-SLIP SHOES
What do you have that my regular shoes don't? Special gripping action? Ha! Just because you keep from falling down, does that make you think you're better than other shoes?
TIP OF MY HAT TO OIL COMPANIES
Some people actually like being anally raped. On behalf of them, I thank you.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO THE GILMORE GIRLS
For being oh so seductively funny, and hooking me into yet another show. At least they're off the air and have a finite number of episodes. You evil temptresses.
TIP OF MY HAT TO YOUR MOM
It's nice that she's going to college. She can better herself there, and get plastered, making it much easier for me to sleep with her.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO COOL, JUNE DAYS
It's just not fair! You know how much I hate the heat, and you tease me, make me think that maybe this summer won't be so hot. But it will be!

Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger May 2007 Edition

TIP OF MY HAT TO CENTER STAGE PRODUCTIONS
For putting on A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, and at least half of the gay males in the cast actually acted straight!
WAG OF MY FINGER TO AXIS NIGHTCLUB
You make us sit on bar stools with no backs for over two hours to see the great CTP shows!!!
TIP OF MY HAT TO THE MAN
For always bringing me down and keeping my humble.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO ICE-CREAM
It certainly is delicious, isn't it?
TIP OF MY HAT TO JENNIFER HUDSON
For winning the Oscar, and now being available for my viewing pleasure on DVD.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO GREY'S ANATOMY
For introducing so many great new cast members for the spinoff. The last thing I need right now is another show to watch!!!
TIP OF MY HAT TO LOST
For bringing the naysayers back into the fold with your brilliant plot twists.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO LOST
For setting a cancellation date of spring 2009. That's cutting and running! Haven't you learned anything from our president??? Never set a timetable!!! Now the Others just have to sit back and wait until the show goes off the air to kill our heroes.
TIP OF MY HAT TO GHOSTS
Because once I pretended to be one and scared the shit out of my friend and it was HILARIOUS!!!
WAG OF MY FINGER TO EVOLUTION
If I'm so evolved, how come I can't get a date? :)

Qop!
Eh, I don't feel like doing one today. Sorry.

Birthday Sharers

I have a Top Ten list today, but first some entertainment news. The season finale of What About Brian? is tonight, and Molly Willow, tv reporter for The Dispatch, whom I usually agree with seemed to think it would be the series finale, and that it was a good thing. That is one of my favorite shows! I loved it at first, and it got much better with some retooling of the cast this year. I will be deeply upset if this is the last episode ever tonight. Also, Shannon and Boone are on Lost this week. What the hell!?! And Billy Dee Williams. Gotta love Lando. And the Battlestar Galactica season finale last night was FANTASTIC!!! OMG!!! I can't believe who The Four are!!! And who is the last one? I have to wait until frackin' January to find out? Come on!

Ok, Top Ten People I'm Glad Share My Birthday (which is today, by the way)
10. J-Kwon - Ok, I don't even know who the rapper is. But I only found ten people who share my birthday. Although a Krogers clerk a couple of weeks ago should prob beat him for #10. And the fictional character of Capt. Kirk (Nimoy's dig on Shatner) also has this birthday. Let's call it a three way tie.
9. Martin Short - Sorry. I don't think he's been funny since Three Amigos.
8. Diana Ross - So, yeah. Um. Yeah.
7. Kenny Chesney - I actually own his greatest hits, though I haven't listened to them since I bought them. I was dating a country music fan at the time, who was in love with him.
6. Alan Arkin - I want to see Little Miss Sunshine!
5. James Caan - Great actor. Just great.
4. Steven Tyler - I don't want to close my eyes. I don't want to fall asleep. Cause you'll probably be dead before I wake up, you old geezer. :)
3. Keira Knightley - Soooooooooo hot!
2. T. R. Knight - Yep, good ol' George from Grey's, even I'm still pissed with him for sleeping with Izzy. You're a married man, George! Tequilia is no excuse!

And #1. Leonard Nimoy. Spock will always be my #1. Yay Spock!


Qop! (I haven't really kept up with Idol since the final 24, but props to this quote)
"Did you know that Sanjaya is an ancient Indian name meaning 'William Hung'?" ~ Jay Leno

Grey's Anatomy Spinoff

I have been getting more and more excited about the new Grey's Anatomy spin off. I love the show, and I can't wait for a double helping every week. Luckily, in the next 3 or 4 episodes before they do the two hour finale slash spin off pilot, there will be some more great things, including a new doctor, and Shoresh Adshaloo, or whatever her name is. I adored her on 24, X-Men 3, and The Exorcism of Emily Rose. And Callie (Tony award winning actress Sara Ramirez) will supposedly be discovered to be a lounge singer during her off shifts from the hospital. Yay! The bad thing is, the cast is supposedly up in arms that Addison got the spin off. They all wanted it. Oh, well. Now for the Top Ten Reasons I'm excited about the new Grey's Anatomy spin off. Most reference actors cast to star in the new show.
10. Chris Lowell... this actor has been so barely used on Veronica Mars this season that I have no idea if he's any good or not.
9. Merrin Dungey... although I was never a big fan of Francie on Alias, it's cool that she's been cast. Maybe I'll like her more this time.
8. Amy Brenneman... Star of Judging Amy and NYPD Blue, I never watched either. I hear she's great. Can't wait to see her.
7. I'm bound to learn to do some medical procedures if I keep watching this stuff.
6. No Meredith. That will make me smile. Meredith can be pretty lame.
5. Kate Walsh is like my favorite Grey's Anatomy star. If anyone deserves the spin off, it's her.
4. Lisa Kudrow... Who doesn't like Phoebe from Friends, or the numerous movie and other tv roles that Lisa has played? It surprises me that she has signed on to star, but I'm ok with it.
3. Marti Noxon... She helped Joss keep Buffy and Angel both high quality shows. I'm sure she can help Shonda do the same.
2. Tim Daly... I was so disappointed when Eyes and The Nine flopped, because I love Tim Daly, and I loved both shows. It's about time he was attached to a winning project. He's being billed at McDreamy 2.0 and a love interest for Addison.
1. Have you read that all star lineup I just talked about? Yeah, enough said. Grey's Anatomy as if it had been made with big names. It's got to do well.

Qop! (from Eyes, which I guess aired the rest of their season one from spring 2005 these past few months, but I missed them :()
Meg Bardo: Sir, with a soundproof room, a butane lighter and a pair of pliers, I'll get him to tell where that girl is.
Chris Didion: Well, be all that you can be.
Meg Bardo: Yes, sir.
Chris Didion: Let's keep that for the backup plan.
Meg Bardo: Right.

City of Angels

I went down to Axis last night and saw City of Angels, a musical several of my friends were in. It was great. I highly recommend everyone goes and sees it next Friday night. You can get tickets at centerstageplayers.com To be honest, I think my friends were among the most, if not the most, talented in the cast. Jonathan had a small part, but he cracked me up, especially when rubbing lotion on a hot woman's leg and acting like he liked it. :) Mary and Lisa were members of the quartet, which was a sort of chorus but much more interesting, and they were hilarious! They did lots of cool stuff that kind of held the shoe together. Mary's facial expressions were to die for, and when Lisa grabbed Jonathan and held his face in her boobs, I almost peed my pants. I saved Michael for last because all I can say about him is... WOW! He played a Latina cop out to get the detective in the murder mystery, and every time he came on stage, he totally stole the show. He was a larger than life character, and his musical number was the best. I can't wait to see them all star in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum in April. Esther and I are prepetual audience members now. :)

Also, the Grey's Anatomy spinoff, Taye Diggs is going to costar! And it will be an ensemble cast. Cool. Oh, and I moved the speakers and laptop away from my TiVo, and it seems to be working fine again. Who ever knew that that would mess things up?

Qop!
"You bitch!" ~ Jonathan's improved line when the hot women exposes his homosexuality

Change, Change, Change

First, I would like to tell you all about a little YouTube video called Chad: Vader. The first few episodes were called Chad Vader: Dayshift Manager, and featured a guy in a Darth Vader costume working at a grocery store. After he lost the job, they are now just called Chad Vader. Six episodes have been posted, including the new one a week ago. Each episode is only 5 minutes. They are all well worth a watch.
Also, my favorite Grey's Anatomy stay is leaving the show in May! She is supposed to be leaving with her own spinoff, which I support. Two hours of Grey's a week would be bliss. If she leaves, though, it had better get off the ground.
Right now, I am in a transitional stage of my life. I know that. Change can be good, right? I mean, I will be a full fledged teacher by December, provided I can finish the program and stay sane. Right now I am halfway through an unpaid field experience, so I'm busy, poor, and stressed. Also, I really feel like my car could die at any second, or at least the brakes may give out permanently. To cope, I have allowed other changes to infiltrate my life. For instance, I have officially retired Netscape from my computers. I resisted forever. I was still running like a three year old version of it because I hate the new versions. Finally I faced reality that it was dead, and I am now a Firefox user. So yay. I also rearranged my bedroom. I think it looks good. My recliner is in a cubby corner instead of the middle of the room. The only weird part is my TiVo cord blocks the door, so when I'm not watching TiVo on the tv, I disconnect it. It still records and everthing.
Well, actually, it may not still be recording. Speaking of TiVo, the past 24 hours have been rough for my little box. I left the standard DVR and switched to the big TiVo five months ago with quite a lot of hesitation. My box has been acting up for a day now, only recording partial programs (thankfully nothing important airs on Friday), playing back choppy, and just plain crashing. I called the service line, and they wanted to charge me $60 (for labor and shipping) for a replacement. I only paid $30 for the box in the first place, and my one year contract is not even half over! Turns out they only replace free for 90 days, so I'm stuck with a malfunctioning unit and a contract that I would be penalized for cancelling. So I was going to suck it up and pay the $60, until I found out that I also have to put a $266 deposit down. It will be paid back to me when I ship them the old box. Well I don't know about you, but I don't have $266 in my bank account, and with my current employment status, it will be some time again before I do. I guess if the box dies I might as well just ship it and then I don't have to pay the $266, but that leaves me with no box for a week, which sucks. After 45 minutes with the tech guy, I am still at a loss about what to do. I am transferring programs to my computer so if the box crashes, I will still have last week's show to watch on the new one. Hopefully it will at least stay alive to let me do that. But faced with a week of no TiVo would be a scary thing, because my obsessive compulsiveness doesn't allow me to miss episodes of shows. If it can just hold out until March, when everything is on rerun... We'll see.

Qops! (from Grey's Anatomy)
Dr. Alex Karev: Why are you helping me?
Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: [yells] 'Cause it's what Jesus would freaking do!

Dr. Cristina Yang: I need you to help me find the leg!... Aren't boyfriends supposed to help in situations like this?
Dr. Preston Burke: When we're on duty, I can't be your boyfriend.
Dr. Cristina Yang: So, when we're on duty, I can have sex with someone else?

Dr. Derek Shepherd: [to a patient and rapist whose victim bit off his penis] I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we managed to stop the bleeding. The bad news is that we gave your penis to the cops.

Dr. Miranda Bailey: Every intern wants to perform their first surgery. That's not your job. Do you know what your job is? To make your resident happy. Do I look happy? No! Why? Because my interns are whiney. You know what will make me look happy? Having the code team staffed, having the trauma pages answered, having the weekend labs delivered and having someone down in the pit doing the sutures. No-one holds a scalpel until I'm so happy I'm Mary Freaking Poppins.

Dr. George O'Malley: He *likes me*, likes me.
Dr. Alex Karev: Go for it, man. Get yours, I'm down with the rainbow.
[George gives him a strange look]
Dr. Alex Karev: Oh, are you not gay?
Dr. George O'Malley: No.
Dr. Alex Karev: Really? Dude, sorry.
[he walks away]
Dr. George O'Malley: [Cristina walks up] Cristina! Do you... does Meredith think I'm gay?
Dr. Cristina Yang: Are you?
Dr. George O'Malley: No!
Dr. Cristina Yang: Really?

Back to Writing

So the snow days continued, and I watched more than enough telvision, even for me. I wish I could get paid to do that, instead of sitting at home and making no money. Some of you may ask, well why didn't you pick up extra shifts at Champps? Do you really think with all of that bad weather that it would have a.) been smart to drive all the way across town and b.) enough customers would have been there to make it worth my time? I answered no to those. I did however get somewhat productive on An Actor's Nightmare Book Four. If you follow the series you know that Book Three is in the editing stages and due out this coming fall. Book Four is still a year and a half away from release, but I wanted to get an early start, so I tackled it head on. I have written a prologue that I am very happy with featuring the funeral of one of my main characters. Why would I be so heartless as to kill off one of the most important people in my books after they survived through the action packed trilogy? Because it happens! There's a twenty year time jump. Do you really think that everyone is still alive? Absolutely not. Most of them are, but somebody important will not be. Sorry. Not that you guys can even hazard a guess as to who it is, because you have not read Book Three, and thus do not know who survived the final assault. Hint: Many people did not! :) Well rather than torment anyone further, I'm off to grad school, but hopefully you will all check out the book and enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it.

Qop! (from Grey's Anatomy)
Dr. Derek Shepherd: [to a patient and rapist whose victim bit off his penis] I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we managed to stop the bleeding. The bad news is that we gave your penis to the cops.

TV Reviews #1 2006-2007

So once again the new tv season is underway, and though I promised myself I wouldn't, I am watching too many shows. Here are my reviews of the season premieres so far, broken down by category. I plan on dropping about half of these in the next couple of weeks. Sorry.

NOT SO GOOD (Probably won't watch): Smith - great premise that doesn't work so well with the cast it has.
Shark - James Woods and Jeri Ryan are great, but the script didn't hook me, nor did the supporting characters, except maybe the daughter.
Til Death - Not a bad show, pretty funny, but it is competing against Earl and Smallville

GOOD: Bones - Dr. Brennan still hasn't found her father. Angela and Hobbes? Really?
Justice - Kerr Smith and Victor Garber shine, but will their clients always be innocent?
My Name is Earl - Back to the same old, same old of last year, but funny.
Ghost Whisperer - So is Aisha Tyler off the cast or not? I mean, she's dead. Weird episode.
Family Guy / American Dad - They just aren't as funny as they used to be.

GREAT: The Class - from David Crane, co-creator of Friends. I smell another hit.
The Office - Great episode, but I need Jim & Pam together!
Boston Legal - Aww, bring back Parker Posy. I love Shirley Schmidtho
Prison Break - Run, Michael, Run! And go pick up Sarah!!!!!
How I Met Your Mother - How could Lily & Marshall break up? NOOOOO!
Men In Trees - The show I didn't expect to like, but it's like Sex and the City without the annoying Sarah Jessica Parker, and it doesn't pigeonhole the men.

PHENOMENAL: Grey's Anatomy - Grey's stpped it up last year, and so far, they are still delivering. But what will happen to Izzy? And will Meredith choose Derek?
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip - Aaron Sorkin is back, and with a cast like Matthew Perry, Bradley Whitford, Amanda Peet, Steven Weber, Nate Corrdry, Donna Murphy, etc, how can he lose?

Anticipated Upcoming Shows: Saturday Night Live (down five cast members with Seth Meyers as head writer and Weekend Update cohost), Six Degrees (I know it premiered already, but I'm busy!), Everybody Hates Chris, Desperate Housewives, Brothers & Sisters, Smallville, The Nine, Lost, Twenty Good Years, 30 Rock, Help Me Help You, What About Brian? Veronica Mars

Qop!
"Thank god for digital recording technology and not needing sleep!" ~ Me

Random TV Mouthoff

Ok, so the string of shows that I try to keep up with have been frustrating me recently, so hear goes the mouthing off in no particular order. Audrey is not a villian, and they had better not kill of D.B. on 24. Can't wait for Michelle Forbes on Prison Break, and I think Mexican guy is gonna save the day on the execution. Why isn't Ted chasing after his girlfriend, or at least hooking up with Robin on How I Met Your Mother. I am sorry Lost but I am sick of your damn reruns. The West Wing has only three episodes left. I'm glad Toby is getting his focus and I hope he gets cleared even if he doesn't deserve it. Josh had better get back with Donna. Oh, and I hope they find Ainsley-Hayes in the basement. Grey's Anatomy continues to deliver consistently. Take a cue Desperate Housewives, whose place it has switched, although DW has it's moments. The Loop is good, Free Ride is ok, and Sons & Daughters is on it's last leg with me, even though it just premiered. I miss Joey. One episode back and it's gone again. Maybe it's for the best. Four Kings is back and good, Out of Practice is almost back, and where did Crumbs go? I couldn't care less about American Idol anymore. Mandisa is going to lose and there's not really anyone else great left. Sorry Paris. On Will & Grace, I am disappointed Taye ended up being such an ass. Well, Grace will get with Leo and Will will get with the policeman and Jack will be disappointed, but keep chasing. I am already showing that I watch too much tv, aren't I? If it weren't for the actors on Bones I would have stopped watching, although it is good. And Veronica Mars is going to have a thrilling end. Can't think of anything else. Thank goodness these shows aren't on every week or I'd be dead.

Qop! (24)
"Who is your informant?"
"Audrey Rains."
"No!"
"Everyone has their price."

My Alias

My book is selling ok so far...keep buying people! :) Go to www.amazon.com and search the title An Actor's Nightmare to purchase your copy today! Anyway, other than that I have been working my butt off. Still pulling full time hours at Steak N Shake and substituting every day (except not today because it was a snow day, which disappointed me). But the reason for my entry:
Alias is finally coming to an end. It was inevitable, and I said all summer this should be it's last season. However, they did a major cast overhaul and there were so many ways to go with it so I was finally getting comfortable with the idea that the show would go on. That and Jennifer Garner supposedly signed a contract to take the show through 2007. Then the bad news comes around Thanksgiving. This will indeed be Alias's last season. Now they are rocketing towards one exicitng closer! Vaughn is dead, and Irena is back! Or is Vaugh dead? Maybe? Some of my friends think not. Something is going on with Sydney's baby, and now Prophet Five and SD-6 are connected! Yes, this is going to be one well of a season. If they could just bring back Weiss and Marshall's wife I'd be happier. Oh, well. Here we go!
P.S. The rumor out is that Star Trek XI will focus on the mirror universe and star William Shatner and Patrick Stewart, and possibly Scott Bakula. Anyone else afraid of this concept?
P.P.S. Go Eva Longaria for being included with the rest of the Housewives in this year's Golden Globes nominations, and Candence Bergen for her nomination. Also props to My Name Is Earl and the much better than last season Grey's Anatomy. Now will they halt the possible cancellation of Arrested Development? I mean, we're going to get Justine Bateman fod goodness sakes! Fox, don't cancel it!!!

Qop!
WILLOW: Promise me you'll never be linear.
OZ: On my trout.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Choices"

Premiere Season Part Two of Two

FOR VERY IMPORTANT AND GREAT WEST WING NEWS, READ IMMEDIATELY!
I have to take a quick break and talk about The West Wing (Sunday, 8pm, NBC) before anything else. I miss Joshua Malina, I miss Stockard Channing, and I especially miss Janel Maloney as Donna, who has to come back before the end! This season will kind of be like a series finale for the cast we know and love, as evidenced by the great opening. I think they've already given away the new president, but I'll live. What's really cool and exciting is that November 6th's epsiode will be LIVE!!! Not only that, it will only feature two cast members: Alan Alda and Jimmy Smits. Why, you may ask? They are actually going to do a full out debate in character! It will be great fun. Don't miss it. No word on who the moderator will be yet, but we should only see the 3 of them.

And now the long awaited finale of my premiere season 2005 (minus 24 and The Cobert Report, which won't premiere for awhile)... DISCLAIMER: I did not yet watch tonight's shows so all shows are current through yesterday. From here on out through the rest of the season I will only mention spectacular things about shows.
Commander in Chief (Tuesday, 9pm, ABC)~ Gena Davis stars in this great concept of a woman thrust into presidentcy when the president dies, although it has a weak script. She looks a bit too plastic, still it is enjoyable, and has some great moment. I think I'll give it a fair chance this year. Donald Sutherland also stars as next in line after Davis, and wanting the job.
Boston Legal (Tuesday, 10pm, ABC)~ The opening two parter was enough to satisfy anyone missing the amazing series. Heather Locklear added some fun, the new interns were great (well, the guy was), and Rupert Everett completed the fantastic shows. He even translater 'cello' in court and brought a band to perform for another judge. He will be stealing Rhona Mitra away, who has dropped from the ending credits. And ending with Betty White killing the short guy (a.k.a. Beverly Leslie from Will & Grace) was a nice touch.
Close to Home (Tuesday, 10pm, CBS) ~ I like it. Nice, warm, friendly, and still mysterious. The main character, formerly star of Committed, was great, and I enjoy Christian Kane (Lindsay from Angel) as her husband. Not break out hit, but good.
Night Stalker (Thursday, 9pm, ABC) ~ Bad special affects, bad writing. Stuart Townsend and Gabrielle Union will keep me coming back until it sucks even worse, but it's not great.
Veronice Mars (Wednesday, 9pm, UPN) ~ Great strong start with more murder! Veronica should have died, but I'm glad she didn't! Kevin Smith's guest apperance as a clerk in Week Two was fun, and I look forward to Joss Whedon's car dealership in Week Six. Steve Guttenberg is fun, and Charisma Carpenter is out and out sexy. "Can Beaver and Dick come out and play?" Can't wait for Alyson Hannigan and Charisma to do a scene together.
Alias (Thursday, 8pm, ABC) ~ Strong start. I will miss Michael Vartan, but his death was very emotional. Lisa swears he's not dead, but I don't believe her. I think she's grasping straws. We'll see. I'll also miss Nadia and Weiss, but I look forward to Amy Acker's new role. Now they need Lena Olin and Amanda Foreman back and the show may survive. Here's hoping it doesn't jump the shark.
Will & Grace (Thursday, 8:30, NBC) ~ We all knew the live opening would result in goofs, but it was still cool. I look forward to Harry Connick's return. This final season will probably be all right, although don't look for the best episodes of the series.
Ghost Whisperer (Friday, 8pm, CBS) ~ The surprise breakout hit of the season! It's great! I love it! Only watched it for the eye candy of Jennifer Love Hewitt, but oh so glad I did. I highly recomment to everyone. Every episode will make you cry!
Desperate Housewives (Sunday, 8pm, ABC) ~ In the words of Michael my roommate, we returned to an old friend. Still edgy, still fabulous, still amazing. Bree is definitely shining for me this season, and so if Alfre. Go DW!
Grey's Anatomy (Sunday, 9pm, ABC) ~ Entering it's sophomore year, I can finally enjoy this show. The first season was rough and hard to get into, but it's finding it's groove. I like.
Saturday Night Live (Saturday, 11:30pm, NBC) ~ Steve Carrel hosted, and was not breakout amazing. The best bit was the animation of the plane crashing and everyone running, although second place goes to the impression off between the new guys, and third goes to Mike Myer's appearance. I miss Tina Fey. Horatio was funny despite his best efforts to screw up his lines. We need Tina back! She's had the baby like almost two weeks ago! Get back to work! Sadly, Maya will be joining her soon.
America's Next Top Model ~ Nothing to report. Not great. Not good. I'll watch it cause others are and I'm in the room. Plus reality television, despite sucking, is addicting.
Apprentice: Martha Stewart ~ I didn't watch last night because they moved it to compete with Lost (and Veronica Mars), which is it's death wish. The show is pretty much canelled, which is too bad because for once reality tv was good.

Qop!
"Been more'n a year since I had anything twixt my nethers didn't run on batteries!" ~ Kaylee, Serenity, Awesome Movie! GO SEE!

Randomness

In honor of my second viewing of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, my blog today will be completly random.
~ I have not posted in a week since right after my first viewing.
~I posted 11 times last month on 10 days. Yay! I met my goal.
~I have not been on a date in months, have not had a girlfriend in two years. My life has been shit, and not just in the love department. I wonder if that's connected? And here's the kicker. I am not unhappy for the most part. Although I do wish my life wasn't such shit. :)
~Hitchhiker is better the second time. There are some very clever things in it.
~I am absolutely horrible at reading people.
~Will & Grace got renewedand for the first time Jack and Karen will match Will and Grace's salaries. Is that bullshit or what that it took this long?
~I spend too much on food. Meaning I eat out too much, not that I eat too much in general.
~I cannot be thin. I've tried, and I've put effort into it, and while I now have muscles I've never had before, my belly shows no sign of going away and my weight has stayed steady.
~I have slept more this year than probably the last three years combined. And I'm still tired right now. Am I old?
~I really want to amount to something, but I'm not sure I will.
~I have never been able to see my life past this point. Does that mean I will die soon?
~Why aren't the comics more popular? They're funny.
~I have watched more tv in the past two years than the rest of my life combined, and yet feel I have no time for it.
~What is the point of life?
~Why isn't Buffy back on the air yet in some incarnation?
~Why can't Paramount fire Rick Berman?
~Why does everyone like Grey's Anatomy and ER so danged much?
~Family Guy is the funniest cartoon ever. Hands down.
~Why is there brail on the drive through ATMs?
~How come I can't meet a woman that likes me, no matter how perfect they seem?
~Why do pants all fall apart in the same week?
~What is the purpose of getting out of bed in the morning?
~Why did I care about my grades so much for the past 17 years (until this year) when they don't mean shit in the real world?
~Why is my blog so long?
~Why have I been so restless and emotionally numb for so long now? Is something big coming in my life? I've felt it for two years and I'm still waiting for it to hit. But will it ever?

Qop!
"The best laid plans of mice."
"And men."
"What?"
"The best laid plans of mice and men."
"I don't think men had anything to do with it." ~ Slartibartfast and Arthur Dent, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, on the creation of the Earth

Ketchup and Kites

I mean catch up, but I like alliteration. Sorry if my haitus has been longer than Desperate Housewives (actually, it hasn't been!) I said last month I wasn't going to hit 10, and I meant it. End of the quarter madness, exams, band tour, and some killer birthday fun all contributed to that. But this month I will hti at least 10. Sweeps are coming up after all. :)

Speaking of television, let's talk new premieres. I give a 3 out of 10 for the premiere of Grey's Anatomy. It really didn't hold my interest. Eyes on the other hand gets like a 9. I loved it. Jake in Progress gets a 7 out of 10 because it if unique. Every time it thinks about getting dirty, it slips back into Full House values. It's odd and I admit a bit refreshing for today's shows. It would have done very well in the late 1980's. We'll see how it fares today. At least it has a good cast. In terms of season finales (yes, some shows are doing them already) Committed's was o.k. It's a decent show, nothing spectacular, but it makes me laugh occasionally. It will be back next season, as will Joey and Will & Grace. The former I am happy to see because it continues to grow in my heart, but the latter, much as I love it, needs to make next season their last and do a nice send off. It should have been this season. The West Wing season finale this week promises to be amazing, and I look forward to the new presidency coming the middle of next year. Enterprise is going off the air with a dudd, much to my disappointment.

Also, please remember the pope and don't be insensitive and use the phrase "Is the pope Catholic?" for at least a couple of weeks. If you want to know how the election of a new pope works, I recommend watching Eurotrip and reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. I'm not kidding. You learn a lot aout the process. It's really pretty neat. Let's just hope a nuclear bomb doesn't mess up the process like in A&D.

Anyway, the reason to write this morning is because Tim bought me a kite for my birthday. Phil and I decided to take it out for a fly this morning. After 45 minutes and our combined brain power we figured out how to put it together and launch it into the air. Ten minutes later the Kite Eating Tree from Peanuts made it's appearance. I tried to climb the tree to get it down. The lower brances weren't even in my reach. I had to jump, grab on, and pull myself up. And I did! By the time I made it to the top of the tree, I was very out of breath and felt totally old. I used to climb tress all the time (see, I'm straight!). I couldn't shake it loose, and the wind kept shaking the thin branches very hard and I almost died. Since Tree Herder wasn't around to help, Phil and I went inside and gave. Amanda Rhymes With Homosexual witnessed the end of these events, and she will attest to their funniness. (Is that a word?) Anyway, I'm going to take some of this free time to watch some TNG. Take care.

Qop! (after Simon Cowell called Ryan Seacrest on American Idol):
RYAN: Pot, kettle, black, boring.