Momma Said There'd Be Days Like This

This was just one of those very bad days. I woke up this morning and my stupid but adorable cats were staring at me. They have hidden my glasses and I don't know where. I've looked everywhere. So I put in the contacts for the first time in months and my eyes are tired right now but I need to see and the glasses are still missing. Then I went to the bank to cash a savings bond so I would have gas money. One bank that I stood in in line for fifteen minutes doesn't cash savings bonds. The second bank informed me that it will not be one year old for two more weeks and they couldn't cash it until then. Savings bonds are stupid anyway. Why would I need $100 in 30 years? To buy a tank of gas, if that? I hope I am not that hard up for money. The savings bond would already be a year old if my former employer hadn't forgotten me last graduation time and given me the bond late. Then the worst thing of the day happens - I find out my grandmother was taken to the hospital again. She's stabalized for now, but I don't know what's going to happen there.
Then the day takes a more positive turn. My second cousin, who is a mere three months younger than me, is getting married. This is the other side of the family from grandma. My parents skip the wedding, but I go and it is a beautiful ceremony. I'm happy for them, I really am, but of course I have this jealousy because she is younger than me, even if only by three months, and I wanted to be married by now. Of course me eight year old cousin points this out to me several times. Thanks. I love my cousin, but it didn't help. Open bar helped, but I also didn't want to drink too much because I was in public and I had to drive home eventually. So I eat and chat and dance my ass off to forget about my grandma, and my being broke, and my being single, not even a girlfriend for the last three years. And I drink. And eventually I start to feel better. For awhile. Then my worries and stuff come rushing back and I wind up at home, miserable, drinking mixed liquors of whatever I had in my cabinet that is strong but tastes terrible. Good day right? Tomorrow will probably be better. I hope. And any single girls out there, who want a nice guy ready to settle down, call me.

Qop!
"Momma said there'd be days like this. There'd be days like this, my momma said."

His Story

NICK: Wow. As I sit here, or should I say, stand here, playing music for the masses assembling at the Dub Pub, I just am shocked about how bad it sucks tonight here. I mean, we have a country bumpkin couple here wanting country, some guy said he wanted good crap to listen to and what songs I had that wasn’t crap, (which I laughed ‘cause the fucker was wasted and was twenty shades of drunk.)
So alas, here I am. I have no idea how many beers I have consumed, but I believe it’s definitely over like, four. Which for me by 11:30 is well… beyond good. Actually the saving grace of the night will be the journey to and the arrival at Jimmy’s apartment. Either way, I am staying there tonight and I am gonna just chill out and maybe watch some Clerks. Now, going out tonight is a major question; shall I grab a bite to eat on the way there? If so, what shall I grab? Barely anything is open really. I am hoping for some Taco Bell before I get there, but who knows. The nice thing is, it will save me the trouble of driving to Jimmy’s tomorrow when I should be relaxing on Father’s Day.
Shit.
I forgot to grab a card for Father’s Day for Dad. Mother fuckin’ puss bucket.
I wonder how Jimmy’s party is going?

JIMMY: Yay! People are here! Bob showed up and he and I ran to the store real quick. Can I just say how nice it is to have brothers old enough and mature enough and cool enough to hang out with? That’s been one of the best things about the past year or so. Anyway, we got home and Amanda showed up and we watched a sweet episode of Angel. I love that show. Then Kayla showed up. Last night was a really great party, for most of the night, and everyone had quite a bit to drink. Tonight it’s much more relaxed. I am drinking some more of that wine left over from the all day celebration a couple of weeks ago that didn’t actually happen and… well, never mind about that. I’m in a good mood so I don’t want to go into that right now.
Good. It’s time to play a game. People always try to watch movies and stuff during these things, and while I love movies and tv shows as much as the next guy if not more, it’s really hard to pay attention to that stuff during a party. This is just what I needed. A nice game of Scattergories, my favorite game, to distract me from all that has been going wrong in my life the last month or so. I really need that. I find myself lonely and craving company almost every night lately. I hate to be alone. It’s also killing my writing curve. I was writing every day and the last couple of weeks, nothing. I am in the middle of two books I need to get back to it.
Yipee. I am ahead by like fifteen points. I told you that I rock at this game. I wish the judging was better though. These people give no points for creativity. What’s the point of the game if you can’t give off the wall far out answers? I mean, that’s what Scattergories is all about. I thrive on the creative crap. Ah, well. That’s why I’m not winning by thirty points. Oop. Text message. Nick wants to know what’s going on. I’ll let him know. I hope we’re still rocking when he gets here. Maybe he’ll bring us, and by us I mean me, a cute, sweet girl that I can date for a year or two, then propose to, then marry, then move to the suburbs with our 2.4 adorable children and maybe a cat or two, where I support us by writing and… never mind. I need to reply to Nick.

NICK: Apparently… from the text message I just received from him… Scategories is going on. As I stand here, watching a group of fine young ass girls, looking beautiful, I can simply smile. Despite how slow it is and now as busy as the previous weeks, God gives me a luscious view of the fine females out tonight! Hm.

Qop! (Dr. Cox from Scrubs)
The kid's like... he's like a... have you ever seen a drunk baby?
[Carla stares at him]
Eh, it's a long story involving my son, a rum cake, and a low counter. Suffice to say, it turns out that, at first, it's... it's endearing to watch them bounce off of the walls, but man... you take your eyes off them for one second ...and bam! They got a bucket on their head, and they're plowing right through your brand new flat screen TV. God save me, it was barely out of the box.

Unemployment

School ended over a week ago. Almost two weeks ago. And I am unemployed. I lined up two summer jobs at the end of MARCH so this wouldn't happen, then both fell through at the absolute last minute. So I lined up another job, then it fell through. Then I've spent days just going to interview after interview and the jobs that want to hire me are all sales jobs which I can't do. It's not that I don't want to. Some of them would make me lots of money if I could sell, but I can't. I'm not pushy. I'd ask if someone wanted something, they would say no, and I would leave very politely, which isn't how you make money. Something needs to happen fast or I'll be living in a cardboard box. Ok, not literally, but you understand. I am veyr very broke. This whole thing just sucks. I can't wait for school to start again! :)

Qop! (Office Space)
Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence: Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.

Gay Marriage

The gay marriage debate is back in the news. It must be an election year. Bush failed to push the constitutional amendment banning it through the Senate, thank god, but it got attention. The Republicans hope it will let them retain some seats in the fall. For me, it just told me not to vote for DeWine. The whole thing is ridiculous. First of all, if these people really care about the 'threat' or want to do something about it, you'd think it would be debated more than every two years. Also, this is a country of freedoms, and for once we fall behind all of the other civilized countries who already allow it.
Jon Stewart had an interesting guest on The Daily Show this week. They argued for two thirds of the show about gay marriage. His opponent argued that it is a perversion that will lead to support of bigamy and other creepy things. Stewart, rightly in my opinion, argued that it is a natual part of the human progression and it is ridiculous that anyone even fight it. People are born gay, it's not an illness or a disorder. Is it really fair to tell them that their love is any less valid or deserving? I think not. Marriage is not a long standing institution, and for centuries it was more of a business than anything else. The idea that conservatives are trying to 'protect' isn't very old anyway. I am not knocking the marriage-for-love theory. I hope one day to find a woman that I fall in love with and marry. But denying gay people the right to be joined in the union of love known as marriage is just plain wrong.
The good news is, both sides of the debate admit that it's pretty much over. Gay marriage is coming and will be protected soon enough. Throughout history people have fought against allowing others equal rights (slavery, the women's movement) and it is has always ended with the rights being afforded and discrimination slowly dissolving. This issue is just the next step in that and it really angers me when people fight against it. 10% of the population is homosexual. Most people have someone in their family that is. Do you really want to deny them a fundamental right such as falling on love and getting married? Come on people. Grow up and get smart. Or if nothing else, be gracious losers because the battle is already over.

Qops!
"The Bush administration renewed its call for a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. So I guess they feel the only time that guys should be on top of each other naked is in an Iraqi prison." —Jay Leno

"President Bush said he was 'troubled' by gay people getting married in San Francisco. He said on important issues like this the people should make the decision, not judges. Unless of course we're choosing a president, then he prefers judges." —Jay Leno

"Conservative groups are demanding that President Bush support a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. They feel that when the founding fathers were putting the Constitution together they made a mistake by not outlawing it. Have you ever seen the paintings of the founding fathers? The powdered wigs, the frilly collars, the pedal pushers — I think they were for it." —Jay Leno