Some Fantastic Weekend

This was probably the best weekend I have ever had. I tried to think of better weekends, but was a bit at a loss. Granted, I did have to get up at 6am on Saturday to attend my grad school classes from 7:30-1:30, and then i was stuck in traffic for an hour right after class, but from there it only got better and better. I went to a family party celebrating my cousin Chris's 11th birthday. His birthday isn't until November, but it was fun. My Uncle Mike had the best costume, although some of the other family members dressed up as well, and all the costumes were fun. Then, though I don't care about sports, the Buckeyes totally kicked ass, which made the family happy. After a quick piece of pumpkin cake, I rushed downtown to meet my brother David and head to the Schottenstein Center. We arrived early and got great seats. There we saw, LIVE, Jon Stewart, Samantha Bee, Jason Jones, and The Daily Show's executive producer and head writer. There were some truly great moments, including Jon's long tirade on Dick Cheney, followed by his "Eh, he's all right" about Donald Rumsfeld. Then when Stewart led the O-H-I-O, and when Jason talked about being pregnant, and basically eveything out of Samantha's mouth. The crowd of over 12,000 people was great, booing Canada and OSU President Holbrook, and Jon characterisitcally scolded them for it. After that, I went to two Halloween parties. Things were even better because it was daylight savings, and though I stayed up until after 2, it was really only after 1. Awesome!
Sunday was just as great, if not better. I slept in, watched some episodes of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, then Nick picked me up. His parents bought us a bit of Don Pablo's for dinner, and then as my Christmas present, Nick had broughten me a great seat to the Barenaked Ladies concert, coincidentally, at the Schottenstein Center. He also bought me a B*L*A*M t-shirt in the style of M*A*S*H that advertised the Barenaked Ladies Are Me album tour. They sand for two hours and fifteen minutes. Although I got to bed way too late for my 5:30 wakeup time, it totally rocked. They played more than half of their new album, and one song off their next album, which will be released in February, only four months after the last one. Nick, like anyone who preordered or downloaded, has the new album already. They will likely be back in the spring for the second album, and I'm sure that we will attend. I got tons of great pictures. My only complaint was that they didn't play "Fun & Games", since they were in Columbus, Ohio, hot bed of the election, on a college campus, following up Jon Stewart, ten days before the election. Why not play your one blatant anti-Bush song? But technically, it is on the upcoming album, so I guess it made sense. All the songs were flawless, and Tyler's Feliz Halloween was definitely a highlight. It featured the whole band on different instruments than they usually play.
Ok, now back to school and work. Have a great week all!

Qop! ("Feliz Halloween" by Tyler of BNL)
Feliz Halloween, Feliz Halloween, Feliz Halloween, Prosper ano y felici-bean.
Jack-O-Lant!

Three Down; Six To Go

I just finished writing the first draft of An Actor's Nightmare Book Three. For those of you keeping up with the series, Book Two will be out at the end of next month, November 2006. I am well ahead because I already finished Book Three. Granted, I still have a month or two of editing to do myself on it, then I have to send it to my various editors, then I will do another pass myself, so it is far from over. It will still not be about until next fall, probably around November. But the first draft is done! About four or five months earlier in the year than I finished Book Two. I am torn between wanting to jump right into Book Four, or work on some other project for a few months. I probably should take a break, but I love writing it, and since Book Three closed a triology, Book Four will be so much to get back into. I'm thinking of writing some scripts of Nick's comic strip, Dribble for Kids. I'm thinking about working on the other book I started, The Many Loves of Jimmy Bailey, and I'm thinking about getting out my young adult novel, The Berry Go Round, and retooling it to get it ready for release. I finished writing that book years ago. We'll see. I love to write, and I'm sure I will be writing some more soon.

Qop! (BNL: Bull In A China Shop)
I'm a kid in a candy store /I'm a bull in a china shop / I'm a tired old metaphor / For everything you can't afford / And everything you can't afford to be
I'm a public embarrassment / I'm a bottle of diet poison / I'm a walking advertisement / For everything I never meant / And everything I never meant to be
I can't hear a thing / Cause I've stopped listening
I'm the reason I don't go out /I'm afraid I might tell me something / I'm the shadow of every doubt / I'm the product this song's about / I'm the product this song's about to be
I can't hear a thing /Cause I've stopped listening /I can't hear a thing /Cause I've stopped listening
Every morning / Since I was born / It's been hard to look in the mirror / And see my face for the horns
All the fun that the law allows / All the fun but with half the meaning / Come on over, I'll show you how / If you lived here you'd be home by now / If you still lived here you'd be home now with me
I can't hear a thing / Cause I've stopped listening / I can't hear a thing / Cause I've stopped listening

I'm Going to See Jon Stewart

It is going to happen. I am going to see Jon Stewart. Next Saturday at OSU. I got shut out of the tv show, not unexpectedly, as there are so few tickets available, but I get to go to the big event. Thanks to my brother David for getting me the ticket. We're goin to have a ball.
Also, next Sunday I get to see the Barenaked Ladies. Thanks to Nick for that ticket. I can't wait until next weekend. Expect a great blog a week from Monday or Tuesday.
Right now I am tired. I stayed up until 1am working on cover design for Book 2 and story ideas for Book 4 with Nick. And I had a 7:30am class. Hence the randomness.
Ok. I have to go because I am still in class and we are going to watch Oprah.

Qop! (The Daily Show with Jon Stewart)
Stephen Colbert: After all, it was Thomas Jefferson who said "Everyone imposes his own system as far as his army can reach."
Jon Stewart: No, that was Stalin. Thomas Jefferson said that he'd "Rather have free press and no government, than a government and no free press".
Stephen Colbert: Well, what else would you expect from a slave-banging, Hitler-loving queer?

Harrison Ford: I don't really do action movies.
Jon Stewart: You were Indiana Jones.
Harrison Ford: Yeah, but...
Jon Stewart: And Jack Ryan.
Harrison Ford: I always saw Indiana Jones as a comedy.
Jon Stewart: Well, I can assure you it's not.
Harrison Ford: I'll have to let Spielberg know that. "Steve- not funny."
Jon Stewart: You know Spielberg?

Wikipedia is Impentitrable

Last night, someone decided to test just how strong Wikipedia was. I won't say who that someone was, but that's not the point. The names have been changed (or omitted) to protect the guilty. :) Anyway, for a brief time last night, Stephen Colbert's entry read that his favorite book series was An Actor's Nightmare. Thrilling, huh? My few moments of fame. The idea was derived from Stephen Colbert himself when he announced on tv that anyone could change facts on Wikipedia. It is true. Anyone can. However, there is a dedicated group od editors that keep hacks (cough) from making cheesy edits of putting things up just for publicity. After the Colbert change, entries were added for Jerome Wetzel and An Actor's Nightmare. Both of those were also removed within hours. Being on Wikipedia is an honor that I am not qualified for as of yet. Hopefully someday, when book sales are higher, I will be. If anyone has any ideas for PR, please let me know. I really do believe in the quality of the book. I think if I can get the word out, it will take off. Wikipedia is not the way to do it though, folks, but thanks for trying.

Qop! (from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)
In the beginning, the Universe was created. This made a lot of people angry, and has been widely regarded as a bad idea.

It's an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, Man had always assumed that he was the most intelligent species occupying the planet, instead of the *third* most intelligent. The second most intelligent were of course dolphins. Dolphins had long known of the impending destruction of earth and had on many occasions tried to alert mankind but their warnings were mistakenly interpreted as amusing attempts to punch footballs or whistle for titbits.

Slartibartfast: [talking about the Earth] Best laid plans of mice.
Arthur: And men.
Slartibartfast: What?
Arthur: Best laid plans of mice and men.
Slartibartfast: Oh. No, I don't think men had much to do with it.

Zaphod: In the name of people, and freedom, and democracy, and stuff like that, I hereby kidnap myself, and I'm taking this ship with me. Whoo!

DJ

In my last post, I vowed a weekly WOTF, TOTH. By weekly, I of course meant monthly, because sometimes I don't even post weekly. So look for the next installment in about 2-3 weeks. :) On books, though, I have gotten so much work done for the second installment of An Actor's Nightmare, due out in roughly six weeks. Thank you Nick from the bottom of my shoes for his work on the cover design. It is awesome! I can't wait for everyone to see it! Also, the first bimonthly short story is on schedule for a November 1st release, if I can contain my enthusiasm until then. Unlike my blog, the book is always ahead of schedule and up on time. I am also finding some time, albeit a little, to keep up on some of my shows. I have to say The Nine and Six Degrees are two fantastic new shows. Anyway, time to go once more, so until next time, I bid you adieu.

Qop! (from Boston Legal)
You hear the one about the fella who died, went to the pearly gates? St. Peter let him in. Sees a guy in a suit making a closing argument. Says, "Who's that?" St. Peter says, "Oh, that's God. Thinks he's Denny Crane."

Wag of the Finger, Tip of the Hat #1

In keeping with my Stephen Colbert hero worship, I present my very first weekly Wag of the Finger, Tip of the Hat. Tune in every week for my latest six comments about the world. I promise they won't all be out tv.

WAG OF MY FINGER to Saturday Night Live's Season Premiere. I wasn't impressed. It wasn't terrible. The pre-Weekend Update skit was good, and the end of the water jug skit was good, but I expected better. I really wanted to see Lorne come out and copy Wes from the beginning of the Studio 60 pilot. Please do better next week.

TIP OF THE HAT to Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip's second episode. The musical number at the end was inspired. Can't wait to see what's next. Also, Smith really raised the bar in its second week. Go you. And Heroes. Nice.

WAG OF MY FINGER to The Megan Mullally Show. Sorry. You already lost my interest. Justice, if you were more important, you'd be On Notice.

TIP OF THE HAT to Andy Borowitz for the hilarious commentary he continues to deliver every week, some of which is reprinted in the Columbus Dispatch's life section.

WAG OF MY FINGER to Terrell Owens. Come on! Get a life, dude! So you killed yourself, but then you didn't, but we all know you did. Jerk.

TIP OF THE HAT to Stephen Colbert for putting up an actual working Jew apology line. You will get bonus tips is you air one of my apologies. Please. :)

Qop! (Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip "Pilot")
Matt Albie (Matthew Perry): There's gonna be a press conference at noon on Monday announcing that you two are running Studio 60. I know I can count on you to answer questions in a way that doesn't embarrass the National Broadcasting System. Will that be hard for you?
Jack Rudolph (Steven Weber): I wouldn't think it would be hard for anybody. 'Cause if you pointed a camera at two people masturbating it'd be among the least embarrassing things on the National Broadcasting System. I'll tell Blair to start working on the deal.

(Wes Mendell's (Judd Hirsch) rant)
It's not going to be a very good show tonight. I think you should change the channel, change the channel right now or better yet turn off the TV. Now, I know it seems like this is supposed to be funny, but, uh, tomorrow you're gonna find out that it wasn't and by that time I'll have been fired. No, this is not a sketch. This show used to be cutting edge political and social satire, but it's gotten lobotomized by a candy ass broadcast network. Hellbent on doing nothing that might challenge their audience. We're about to do a sketch that everyone's seen like 500 times. No, no one's gonna confuse George Bush and George Plimpton, yeah we get it. We're all being lobotomized by this countries most influential industry. It just throws in the towel on any endeavor to do anything that doesn't involve the courting of 12 year old boys. Not even the smart 12 year olds, the stupid ones, the idiots of which there are plenty thanks to no small mention of this network. So why don't you just change the channel? Turn off the TV do it right now. The struggle between art and commerce. Well, there's always been a struggle between art and commerce and now I'm telling you art is getting it's ass kicked and it's making us mean and it's making us bitchy. It's making us cheap punks and that's not who we are! People are having contests to see how much they can be like Donald Trump. We're eating worms for money. "Who wants to screw my sister." Guys are getting killed in a war that has theme music and a logo. That remote in your hands is a crack pipe, oh yeah sure every once in a while we pretend to be appalled. We're becoming Pornographers! It's not even good pornography. It's just a side of snuff films and friends that's what's next because that's all there is left. And the two things that make them scared gutless of the FCC is and every psycho religious cult that gets positively horny at the mention of a boycott... (CUT OFF THE AIR)