Slang

It is interesting to me how slang changes. I am thinking of it because I was inputting the last comments of two of my editors, Lois and Nancy, in Book Three (due out in late October). I smile every time I see them circle and put question marks next to phrases that seem second nature to me. Two in particular I saw today were "Pathetic much?" and "It is so on." It amuses me that these simple things confuse them, having not heard them before. I guess that it part of the generational gap. Of course certain slang words like cool and such make it into the popular lexicon, but certain phrasing remains isolated, sometimes even to an area or group of people, long before it becomes common knowledge. Things I have said since high school sound strange and foreign to people when they first hear them. It makes me a little self-conscious, as my books are set about another generation or two into the future and I have not given them their own little language quirks; I've merely used the ones I know. Also, will people reading this a few years down the road even understand what I mean? Will they just be confused as my editors are and think that there are typos? I don't know, but that's ok. I don't plan on stopping the slang. I think it adds to the characters and gives them a distinct voice. And that is really all that matters.

Qop! (Randal Graves played by Jeff Anderson in Clerks the cartoon)
[opening argument to the all-black jury of NBA players] Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Dante Hicks is just like you. He lurves grape soda. He knows what it's like when the guy at the supermarket won't take your "food stamps". Or how it feels to wait all month for your "welfare check". [waving his arms from side to side] Hey! Ho! Hey! Ho! Thank you.

New Feature

For the record, before I begin, in the first five days of September, my post number has equaled the entire month of August (also July I think, but not combined). Yay! The topic today is a new feature. Like my hero, Stephen Colbert, I am making my own On Notice and Dead to Me Boards. I will repost and update them on here periodically. If you want to have your own On Notice graphic (this is really cool!), go to http://www.shipbrook.com/onnotice/ Or better yet, type mine in so you can see how cool they look. Here are my current lists in no particular order, with explanations since they're new:

ON NOTICE (created 9/5/6)
Iran - Please please please don't give any more reason for our idiot leader to invade you.
The Democrats - Don't you dare screw up this November.
Mike DeWine - I used to like you, and yet I don't think I'll vote for you this fall.
J. K. Rowling - How long does it take to write a freakin' book!!! It had better be 1000 pages!
Movie Critis - Quit telling me good movies and bad and vice versa. There is no way that Invincible is better than Clerks II
Katie Couric - You are annoying. Get out of my media.
Bones - How dare you replace Bones's boss! Kudos for the great new character though.
Fox - If you get me hooked on one more show and prematurely cancel it, I swear...
Clogs - They look so cool, and yet make my feet stink.
Geese - They are EVIL!!!! I won't make you dead to me, though, because you'll attack anyway and then I'll be dead.

DEAD TO ME
President George W. Bush - What did I ever see in you in 2000?
Condaleeza Rice - If you get to be president, I'm moving to Canada
Steve Irwin - No, seriously. He's dead. :(
Walmart - You axis of evil. You're an axis all by yourself.
Macs - I don't care how user friendly you are. I will NEVER own one of you! Maybe.
Ashland Financial Aid Office - I almost didn't get to start grad school on time.
Grizzly Bears - You make Stephen's life hell so I no longer believe in you.
The International Astonomers - How DARE you make Pluto not a planet?
Anyone Who Hasn't Bought My Book - WHY NOT???????
The Food Service Industry - I have a college diploma. Why do I have to keep working there?

Just so you know, each list will always only be ten things wrong, so we'll see how gets a reprieve after the next thing that angers me. :)

Qop! (all from The Colbert Report)
I've swallowed 18 condoms full of truth and I'm headed across the border!

You know, I've been running this show, four nights a week, for... five nights now...

I believe all God's creatures have a soul... except bears, bears are Godless killing machines!

Facts change, but my opinion never does.

Just because the Pope is infallible doesn't mean he can't make mistakes.

His Story

NICK: Wow. As I sit here, or should I say, stand here, playing music for the masses assembling at the Dub Pub, I just am shocked about how bad it sucks tonight here. I mean, we have a country bumpkin couple here wanting country, some guy said he wanted good crap to listen to and what songs I had that wasn’t crap, (which I laughed ‘cause the fucker was wasted and was twenty shades of drunk.)
So alas, here I am. I have no idea how many beers I have consumed, but I believe it’s definitely over like, four. Which for me by 11:30 is well… beyond good. Actually the saving grace of the night will be the journey to and the arrival at Jimmy’s apartment. Either way, I am staying there tonight and I am gonna just chill out and maybe watch some Clerks. Now, going out tonight is a major question; shall I grab a bite to eat on the way there? If so, what shall I grab? Barely anything is open really. I am hoping for some Taco Bell before I get there, but who knows. The nice thing is, it will save me the trouble of driving to Jimmy’s tomorrow when I should be relaxing on Father’s Day.
Shit.
I forgot to grab a card for Father’s Day for Dad. Mother fuckin’ puss bucket.
I wonder how Jimmy’s party is going?

JIMMY: Yay! People are here! Bob showed up and he and I ran to the store real quick. Can I just say how nice it is to have brothers old enough and mature enough and cool enough to hang out with? That’s been one of the best things about the past year or so. Anyway, we got home and Amanda showed up and we watched a sweet episode of Angel. I love that show. Then Kayla showed up. Last night was a really great party, for most of the night, and everyone had quite a bit to drink. Tonight it’s much more relaxed. I am drinking some more of that wine left over from the all day celebration a couple of weeks ago that didn’t actually happen and… well, never mind about that. I’m in a good mood so I don’t want to go into that right now.
Good. It’s time to play a game. People always try to watch movies and stuff during these things, and while I love movies and tv shows as much as the next guy if not more, it’s really hard to pay attention to that stuff during a party. This is just what I needed. A nice game of Scattergories, my favorite game, to distract me from all that has been going wrong in my life the last month or so. I really need that. I find myself lonely and craving company almost every night lately. I hate to be alone. It’s also killing my writing curve. I was writing every day and the last couple of weeks, nothing. I am in the middle of two books I need to get back to it.
Yipee. I am ahead by like fifteen points. I told you that I rock at this game. I wish the judging was better though. These people give no points for creativity. What’s the point of the game if you can’t give off the wall far out answers? I mean, that’s what Scattergories is all about. I thrive on the creative crap. Ah, well. That’s why I’m not winning by thirty points. Oop. Text message. Nick wants to know what’s going on. I’ll let him know. I hope we’re still rocking when he gets here. Maybe he’ll bring us, and by us I mean me, a cute, sweet girl that I can date for a year or two, then propose to, then marry, then move to the suburbs with our 2.4 adorable children and maybe a cat or two, where I support us by writing and… never mind. I need to reply to Nick.

NICK: Apparently… from the text message I just received from him… Scategories is going on. As I stand here, watching a group of fine young ass girls, looking beautiful, I can simply smile. Despite how slow it is and now as busy as the previous weeks, God gives me a luscious view of the fine females out tonight! Hm.

Qop! (Dr. Cox from Scrubs)
The kid's like... he's like a... have you ever seen a drunk baby?
[Carla stares at him]
Eh, it's a long story involving my son, a rum cake, and a low counter. Suffice to say, it turns out that, at first, it's... it's endearing to watch them bounce off of the walls, but man... you take your eyes off them for one second ...and bam! They got a bucket on their head, and they're plowing right through your brand new flat screen TV. God save me, it was barely out of the box.

Freshmen Year

This week I am following the example of some of my friends and posting college memories. This is Week 7 of my final quarter here at the 'bein, and it is a bit emotional. Here are the memories from my freshman year.

-Didn't want to go to college, didn't want to do marching band.
~Within moments of arriving at OC, loved college, loved marching band.
~Missed my old friends had hung out with them all summer, hung out one saturday in october, and suddenyl had lots of new friends.
~Nate sleeping on my dorm room floor for a week
~being in a squad with jenn and amber and someone else...don't remember who.
~watching All in the Family until my roommate old me to flip to news on the second day of classes: Setember 11, 2001. Not concentrating in class, being scared, canceling afternoon classes.
~Hanging out with Heather Deem over in Davis
~Dinner with Jami Letizia and her band directors, and Roy and Amber and K
~Being pregnant with Liz's baby
~Dating K for exactly one month
~Julie encouraging me to date K, and me trying to help her with a boy she didn't get
~bowling and winding up asleep on the floor with Julie
~Dating Julie for 5 1/2 months
~Esther's 21st b-day party
~Going out to dinner and getting the 'contract' signed with Scott, Evan, Erin, and Timmy J
~Playing soccer with Absurdly Green (Julie, Kristen, etc.)
~Scott coming out of the closet to me
~Brian Grey was only 20% gay
~Hanging out with Brandon
~Falling asleep during concerts
~Pledging Kings. Enough said. :)
~Seeing OC win nationals in basketball with Liza, Nora, and Julie
~Trip to Colorado with Julie, Nora, and Steph
~Having sex on the grassy knoll with Kristen (not really)
~A roommate I never talked to
~Skiing with Julie, Steph, and Jeremie. Sleeping on Steph's parents' floor.
~King's formal with Andy
~Hanging out at the Kings house, being depressed sleeping there
~Roy and Boogie getting me to drink Smirnoff for the first time
~Boogie introducing me to Kevin Smith
~All of us in Boogie's room finding out how to be male porn stars
~"Losing my virginity" to a King's panel
~Evan composing the Jimmy Dailey song
~officially moving into the King's house with Evan, Boogie, Doug, Ivan, and the others.
~My black Santa Claus
~late nights on the Kings porch and walking t Dairy Queen drive through
~Dating K again come summer

That's all I can remeber at the moment. May do attional memories at the end of the week.

Also, it is Question Week in my away message. Today's question is (Feel free to answer it):
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor. Won't you be mine?

Qop!
"So we talked all night about the rest of our lives, where we're gonna be when we turn 25...keep on thinking things will never change, keep on thinking things will always stay the same. But we leave this year and we won't look back, no matter hanging on cause we're on a different track."
~ Vitamin C, Graduation Day

Season Premieres

Ok, I vow to you all to post at least 10 times a month all year (kudos to me if I post 15). So far it is the 10th and this is my 3rd post so I'm not doing too bad, even though it's been a week since my last one. I need to step it up and post every 3rd day. Just to clarify the rules it's 10 posts on 10 different days. No fair of quick posts on same day, although you never know if I might cheat with a little before midnight / after midnight thing. :) Ok, onto this post.

Nick, thank you for your somewhat long but interesting post. I could reciprocate in kind, but I am exhausted and have a hard time narrowing it down. Jersey Girl, Steel Magnolias, AI, Jerry Maguire, and American Wedding certainly all top the list. Addicted to Love and Eternal Sunshine suck though dude! :)

The real point of my post today: Season premieres! They're all in and let's take a quick look at shows just starting or coming back from hiatus:
Joey - Back to it's season with hilarious Lucy Liu. I like this show, but it does lack something. However, it won a People's Choice Award so I think it'll be ok. Most sitcoms start out slow...
Will & Grace - I love this show, but I do hope that next season is it's last. This season so could have been. Getting a little old.
The West Wing - Can I tell you how excited I am about this election? I needed a little pick-me-up after black Tuesday (REMINDER: Wear all black on inaugeration day!) With Leo's heart attack and Donna and Josh quitting, this show just keeps getting better and better. I kind of want the republican Alan Alda to win, but I think Jimmy Smits has it in the bag. Of course, dealing with gay marriage this week, all I have to say is, it's about time. And why can't we elect Jed Bartlett as our real life president?
Lost - just keeps getting better. I love Daniel Dae Kim. I want to see more of his character, and Locke. I swear they're in purgatory!
Desperate Housewives - Oh yeah! Mike is gonna go to jail! :( But can't Terry sing? Oh baby! And she's very hot! :)
Point Pleasant - Premieres next Wednesday, January 19th. Can't wait. The Antichrist. Yikes!
Alias - Great opening! My jaw lie on the floor when Sydney got fired, and I loved Marshall's arrest and "Sloane's here." They so need to bring Weiss in on it. It's gonna kick ass this season. And no matter what anyone says, Irena cannot be dead!
24 - The best opener this season. 4 brand new episodes! How crazy is that? Jack robbing the gas station was great, and I so called the tea as soon as the mother offered to make it. I miss everyone (except Chloe who I hate and wish was gone), but they'd better all come back later this season! How cool would a strike force of Jack, Palmer, Chase, Tony, Michelle, and D.B. Woodside be? I mean seriously.

Also, thanks to all my homies who I watch most of these shows with. They wouldn't be the same without conversations of ice cubes, gasoline, the 24 monarchy, and lyme disease. You all rock!

NEW FEATURE: QUOTE OF THE POST (Or Qop, because it sounds funny):
(From the Bob & Tom Show today: "Budda was too fat to hang on the cross, so they said 'Well, just let him sit quietly.'"

Let's Get Emotional About it!

Have you ever felt that... well.. you need a good cry? You know, even if you're a man, you just want to sit down, while no one else is looking, cept possibly with a girlfriend to, in our own man-like idea of possibly scoring browning points... okay, I'm starting to ramble off, but, every once and awhile... even a guy needs a hug. Or heck, a nice "feel good" movie at the end of the day. Or maybe some nice little emotional movie. So I thought I decided to share with you, some great and what I call my top 20/21 and in no particular order "emotional movies."


1 Almost Famous (I prefer the director's cut "Untitled: The Bootleg Cut)
This movie feels like me. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I really just like to connect to my characters, but while I don't particually write music reviews, why is it I relate to Willam more than I prolly should? The whole dynamic of Penny Lane, Willam and Russel make the film, and of course, who can forget Jason fucking Lee??

2 Good Will Hunting
What can I say. Robin Williams makes this movie the great flick it is. Sure, I am a fan of Damon and Affleck too, but come-on. His relationship with Lambeu makes the movie. He geuiniely cares for the boy and the whole subplot with his wife... Skylar leaving and Will pushing her away... Just a great coming of age flick. And of course, that damned Pudge Fisk card.


3 A.I. - Artificial Intelligence
While I had to watch the DVD's second disc to understand the symbolic importance of what the fuck Jude Law was really doing in the movie, the ending of the movie makes you weep like a little girl. I don't know. I don't have a great super duper all sunshine and roses relationship with my mom. I wish I did though. And in a way, I want what David (the cute robot kid) wants. To love his mother and to have her love in return. And not have any one or anything matter but that love. And... that makes you fucking weep.


Weep.

4 Ocean's Eleven
We're moving to "Feel Good and Cheer Me Up" territory here, everytime I watch this movie, I am still amazed they fucking pull off that heist. And yes, I know what's going to happen. But it still amazes me. And they still look just as cool! I mean... fuck, I need to get George Clooney's trainer. Or agent. Or both.

5 You've Got Mail
I don't know what it is about this movie. First time I watched it in theaters, I was mildy dissapointed with it. Then I saw it on TNT and something about the movie stuck me differently. The actors of Ryan and Hanks, and EVERYONE in their supporting cast ranging from the little boy (F-O-X), Dabney Coleman to Greg Kinnear, it oozes of a romantic let-me-down-pick-me-up film that just gives you hope. And that's refreshing for a change.


6 Disney's Lilo & Stitch
Maybe it's Elvis, maybe I just darker things when I get older. But I LOVE this movie. To quote comic book guy from The Simpsons.. "Favorite. Movie. Ever." Well, in terms as far as Disney is concerned. ;-) But, this tale is quite dark when you get to the heart of it. Nasty possibly bloodthirsty alien bent on destructing worlds, intergalatic police, and a girl soon to be ripped from her sister's custody to her sister's lack of responsibility. Those are the basic roots of the film, but when you watch it, you just feel all... happy in the end. While no sequel or TV show will truly recapture (at least this point in time shows us this) the magic of the ending gives you during the "Burning Love" rendition by Wyonna, you truly feel a sense of Ohana, and that family is what you make it. (And the saddest part? "I'm... I'm lost. I'm lost." )


7 Addicted to Love
While I know Jimmy will shoot this down very quickly, and for reasons I quite reasonably understand, this is one of those "Get revenge" films, that soon turns into a blossoming relationship between Broderick and Ryan. Also, I find it just plain funny, and relatable. When you are obviously facing rejection your heart finds hope as the person you loved is on a pedestal and you can't let them go. Let's just say... "a smile chart" made by Broderick's character (an astrologer and studier of life and stars obviously) relates to ANOTHER chart of her moods within the week, and it leads him to conclude she (his ex played by Kelly Preston) will break up with her new fiance, some french guy. Yes, halarity ensues, and there is even talk of Lassie getting it on with Timmy.

8 Jerry Maguire
"SHOW ME THE MONEY!"
Come one. Despite that nice "catchphrase" which spread like wildfild across America during the Christmas and summer of 1998 to 1999, Jerry Maguire was a film for sportfans and non sportfans alike, about... gee golly gosh. Love. Friendship too. I mean I think the film rests on Gooding Jr. and Cruise's interaction, even tho that blonde chick and cute kid, awe hell, they work too.

9 Rudy
Okay, back to emotional territory-ville, Rudy is a football film for people who, it doesn't matter about what ti is. While it's more biased towards the land of football than previous entry Jerry Maguire, it shows off "Samwise Gamgee" himself, Sean Astin as a great actor, and the music plays a huge part in the finale of the film, which leads that dreams CAN come true if you work hard at it.

10 Kissing A Fool
Not many people know of this film. And while it's not funny, it doesn't make you cry, it's a good emotional film. And Jason Lee. And that Ross guy from Friends. And oh yeah, he's a dickhead in the movie. Actually worth a watch.

11 Awakenings
This is an older movie by Penny Marshall, starring Robin Williams and Bob DeNiro. The movie will have you crying like a girl at the end. Actually this is almost as close with Artifical Intelligence in the "Cry like a woman" film department.

12 Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
The movie is very odd. So odd, most people will either love or hate the movie. But Jim Carrey gives his best performance since... well I hate to say it but he outdoes Truman Show. It's bout a guy who finds out his girl, or EX-girlfriend, erased all her memories of him. So he gets revenge and does the same thing. In the mind, we see the process occur, but the mind of the human is a terrible thing to destroy, as it makes you the person you become. And history can be upt to.... repeat itself. But.. Jim Carrey's most honest and terrific performance.

13 The Truman Show
The first big film that was overlooked. The Truman Show is a film that really makes you weep for Truman and hate Cristof. While his intentions are pure and good, Cristof cripples and destroys Truman actually, depending how you look at it, so yeah. It's another movie about the man bringing us down. Makes you feel good for Truman tho at the end. and actually gets a bit of a tear from me.


14 Saving Private Ryan
Speilberg. Hanks. Tripple X. (xXx) and Damon. (minus Affleck) This war flick pulls your heartstrings when you finally reach the last 20 to 30 minutes of this great war epic from War World 2.

15 The Iron Giant
I never thought a cartoon would make me cry. I mean, as much as this. (Yes, more so than Lilo & Stitch...) If you never seen it, for shame. The movie is so heartfelt and it's from the guy who did The Incredibles. YES. So go watch something that really tugs your heart. For the person you are is not the person others think you are. You are who you want to be. Even if it's Superman. And there is a missle coming for the earth. Go get em, Superma-- err I mean "The Iron Giant."

16 That Thing You Do!
Tom Hanks would win the award for actor most on my list. But it's true. The guy makes kick-ass movies. This goes into the "Feel Good" Category. while Ocean's Eleven is about making you feel about robbing a casino, That Thing You Do! is about the (I believe) creation of the " One Hit 'Wonders' " and Guy, (the drummer) growing up. Also, that song, it's peppy, and catchy. Just like Hanks says in the movie! Well don't that beat all! Or as Guy would say... "I am SPARTACUS..."

17 Disney's The Lion King
Scar kills Simba's Dad. ANd it's sad, alright? And it's good. Timon and Pummba. Scar, Simba and the whole Pridelands. What more do you need?

18 Jersey Girl
Kevin Smith's ode to his wife... and in a way, his father, a touching tribute to child-raising. And the ending rocks. I mean come on. Ben Affleck singing? Comedy genius! The burial scene of J-Lo with that touching Aimee Mann song? Sad as hell! If you've not seen this, what are you waiting for? Follow's Jimmy's example, a great one mind you, and see the movie multiple times!!!!! You honestly won't regret it.

19 The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Whoa whoa whoa! There are a lot of reasons I bring this up. First off, The two parts of the film, or the "trilogy" which rings kick-ass for me, are both Sam's, and that is his monolouge in Two Towers in what makes us go on in face of evil and danger surrounding us... and of course, the best fucking line ever... "I know I can't carry the ring for you... but I can carry you." Granted I'm sure I ruined it, but when all hope is lost, it brings the biggest smile on your face as a viewer. We've invested... 7 hours at least into the film (s) and we want to see something good happen. But while we're winning on our fronts, the ring is not yet destroyed. And Frodo is turning evil! I mean COME ON!! But, um, yes. Anyway. :-D

20 Spider-man/Spider-man 2
Now... alot of people may be going.. "what? Emotional? C'mon. It's an action super hero movie." But really... I totally relate to Peter Parker. I do. I mean, I wasn't the popular kid. My "Spider-man" powers were my talents of singing and being the band geek. And I wasn't normal like everyone else. I don't care too much for sports, and I talk about movies constantly or stuff that pop culture fans only would know. And... every guy has "The girl next door" that they fell in love with in High School. I had mind. We never honestly got her, but it's good Spider-man did. and he got to kick ass webslinging in the process too. While I count Spider-man 2 more so than the first film, the first film is not without it's merit. The death of Uncle Ben was horrifying for me, (I saw my grandmother's life slip out of her, and it was haunting very much like the film's actor) and the fact Peter didn't really get MJ at the end, was refreshing. And to see everything pay off in film 2, (more notably, a very touching moment which brings tears to my eyes are the train sequence, the end of the film's "This is heavy." and of course, the "Raindrops Are Falling On My Head" sequence) is what makes it all worth while and not just another comic book movie, but an actual well developed character I care about.

Okay, while these are my top 20, I do want you to know these are mine. These do not reflect Jimmy's opinions in anyway, and while I know Artificial Intelligence is prolly on the list somewhere along with American Wedding, I'm sure..... ;-)

But I digress. Please share (including you Jimmy) your Top 20 Emotional Films, and these can be films that moved you in a good way (made you feel really good after you watched it) or made you just cry. If you can't think of 20 (I'm a movie geek... I understand) just list how ever many you have!