The Return of Chef

Aren't you guys lucky? I've been updating a lot lately. Today's topic: The Return of Chef. If you missed South Park last night, I am so sorry for you. I'm sure they'll rerun it. Here's the rundown of why it was so great. Isaac Hayes, who has voiced Chef for the nine seasons that have aired thus far, quit the show a week or two ago because South Park made fun of Scientology in a recent episode. Granted, the show makes fun of all religions and Hayes has never had a problem with it, until now. I guess he hold his religion to a higher standard or something. I think he's a big jerky hyprocrite for quitting the show over it, but that's just me. Oh, I know he says that wasn't the reason exactly, but everyone can read between the lines. Trey Parker and Matt Stone put together an amazing episode to transition to a series with no more of Hayes's Chef. The episode was called "The Return of Chef" and it ran last night. They faked a 'previously on South Park' where Chef ran off to join the Super Adventure Club. In last night's episode he returned, but started acting differently. He now wanted to turn his love making charms onto little children, such as the kids he serves lunch to at school. The dialogue was badly edited Hayes dialogue from other episodes, which made it all the funnier that something wasn't right. The boys discover that Chef was brainwashed by the Super Adventure Club. The Adventure Club climbs mountains and such, but the Super Adventure Club travels around the world and molests children. Ensuing is a parallel between the beliefs of the SAC and Scientology that never even tried to be subtle. It was hilarious. And in the end Chef chooses to stay with the SAC anyway, then is promptly impaled then torn apart by a mountain lion and a grzzily bear. The episode ends with a funeral in which Kyle proclaims that they should remember the wonderful man Chef was and not the crappy brainwashing he got sucked into (i.e. Isaac Hayes and Scientology). The coda reveals the SAC has put together a Chef Vadar, with a big reveal and a new voice, allowing the character to continue in a fun new way without Hayes, and as a villian. To top that off, Tom Cruise threatened not to promote MI3 for Paramount if they reran a certain episode last week, so they had to do different reruns instead of the scheduled ones. Paramount claims they switched reruns to honor Hayes, but again, the public knows better. Was that cool or what? Six more episodes left this season! I can't wait.

Qop!
"Oh my God, they killed Chef!"
"You bastards!" ~ Kyle and Stan, "The Return of Chef"