TV Reviews #1 2006-2007

So once again the new tv season is underway, and though I promised myself I wouldn't, I am watching too many shows. Here are my reviews of the season premieres so far, broken down by category. I plan on dropping about half of these in the next couple of weeks. Sorry.

NOT SO GOOD (Probably won't watch): Smith - great premise that doesn't work so well with the cast it has.
Shark - James Woods and Jeri Ryan are great, but the script didn't hook me, nor did the supporting characters, except maybe the daughter.
Til Death - Not a bad show, pretty funny, but it is competing against Earl and Smallville

GOOD: Bones - Dr. Brennan still hasn't found her father. Angela and Hobbes? Really?
Justice - Kerr Smith and Victor Garber shine, but will their clients always be innocent?
My Name is Earl - Back to the same old, same old of last year, but funny.
Ghost Whisperer - So is Aisha Tyler off the cast or not? I mean, she's dead. Weird episode.
Family Guy / American Dad - They just aren't as funny as they used to be.

GREAT: The Class - from David Crane, co-creator of Friends. I smell another hit.
The Office - Great episode, but I need Jim & Pam together!
Boston Legal - Aww, bring back Parker Posy. I love Shirley Schmidtho
Prison Break - Run, Michael, Run! And go pick up Sarah!!!!!
How I Met Your Mother - How could Lily & Marshall break up? NOOOOO!
Men In Trees - The show I didn't expect to like, but it's like Sex and the City without the annoying Sarah Jessica Parker, and it doesn't pigeonhole the men.

PHENOMENAL: Grey's Anatomy - Grey's stpped it up last year, and so far, they are still delivering. But what will happen to Izzy? And will Meredith choose Derek?
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip - Aaron Sorkin is back, and with a cast like Matthew Perry, Bradley Whitford, Amanda Peet, Steven Weber, Nate Corrdry, Donna Murphy, etc, how can he lose?

Anticipated Upcoming Shows: Saturday Night Live (down five cast members with Seth Meyers as head writer and Weekend Update cohost), Six Degrees (I know it premiered already, but I'm busy!), Everybody Hates Chris, Desperate Housewives, Brothers & Sisters, Smallville, The Nine, Lost, Twenty Good Years, 30 Rock, Help Me Help You, What About Brian? Veronica Mars

Qop!
"Thank god for digital recording technology and not needing sleep!" ~ Me

Random TV Mouthoff

Ok, so the string of shows that I try to keep up with have been frustrating me recently, so hear goes the mouthing off in no particular order. Audrey is not a villian, and they had better not kill of D.B. on 24. Can't wait for Michelle Forbes on Prison Break, and I think Mexican guy is gonna save the day on the execution. Why isn't Ted chasing after his girlfriend, or at least hooking up with Robin on How I Met Your Mother. I am sorry Lost but I am sick of your damn reruns. The West Wing has only three episodes left. I'm glad Toby is getting his focus and I hope he gets cleared even if he doesn't deserve it. Josh had better get back with Donna. Oh, and I hope they find Ainsley-Hayes in the basement. Grey's Anatomy continues to deliver consistently. Take a cue Desperate Housewives, whose place it has switched, although DW has it's moments. The Loop is good, Free Ride is ok, and Sons & Daughters is on it's last leg with me, even though it just premiered. I miss Joey. One episode back and it's gone again. Maybe it's for the best. Four Kings is back and good, Out of Practice is almost back, and where did Crumbs go? I couldn't care less about American Idol anymore. Mandisa is going to lose and there's not really anyone else great left. Sorry Paris. On Will & Grace, I am disappointed Taye ended up being such an ass. Well, Grace will get with Leo and Will will get with the policeman and Jack will be disappointed, but keep chasing. I am already showing that I watch too much tv, aren't I? If it weren't for the actors on Bones I would have stopped watching, although it is good. And Veronica Mars is going to have a thrilling end. Can't think of anything else. Thank goodness these shows aren't on every week or I'd be dead.

Qop! (24)
"Who is your informant?"
"Audrey Rains."
"No!"
"Everyone has their price."

Season Opener Awards

These awards are for just the first few weeks of the season. Pleas let me know your pics, through e-mail (vote@actorsnightmare.com) perferably, and then I'll choose winners, mostly by what you go by if you vote, and post them in a few days.
BEST GUEST STAR
Cha Chi on Arrested Development
Rupert Evert on Boston Legal
Janeine Garafolo on The West Wing
Christine Baranski on Ghost Whisperer
NEW SERIES MOST LIKELY TO GET CANCELLED FIRST (Not Worst)
The Apprentice: Martha Stewart
Invasion (which I already gave up on)
Out of Practice
Command in Chief
Freddie
Night Stalker
How I Met Your Mother
OLD SERIES MAY NOT MAKE IT THROUGH THE SEASON
Joey
Will & Grace
Alias
Two And A Half Men
BEST NEW SHOW
My Name Is Earl
Everybody Hates Chris
Ghost Whisperer
Prison Break
Reunion
WORST NEW SHOW
Invasion
Everybody Hates Chris
Bones
Out of Practice
BEST ACTOR (New Cast Members Only)
Alan Alda The West Wing
David Borenanaz Bones
Brent Spiner Threshold
Rob Benedict Threshold
Neil Patrick Harris How I Met Your Mother
BEST ACTRESS (New Cast Members Only)
Emily Deschanel Bones
Charismas Carpenter Veronica Mars
Alfre Woodard Desperate Housewives
Michelle Rodriguez Lost
Stockard Channing Out of Practice
BEST NEW THEME SONG
Reunion
Prison Break
Bones
Ghost Whisperer
Commander in Chief
BEST ANIMATED / VARIETY SHOW
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Family Guy
American Dad
Is there really another nominee?
SHOW THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MENTIONED ABOVE BUT WASN'T
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
Kitchen Confidential
King of Queens
Hot Properties

Qop!
"Dear Buddha, I would like a pony and a plastic rocket." ~ Captain Mal, Serenity, Again, Go See!

Premiere Season Part Two of Two

FOR VERY IMPORTANT AND GREAT WEST WING NEWS, READ IMMEDIATELY!
I have to take a quick break and talk about The West Wing (Sunday, 8pm, NBC) before anything else. I miss Joshua Malina, I miss Stockard Channing, and I especially miss Janel Maloney as Donna, who has to come back before the end! This season will kind of be like a series finale for the cast we know and love, as evidenced by the great opening. I think they've already given away the new president, but I'll live. What's really cool and exciting is that November 6th's epsiode will be LIVE!!! Not only that, it will only feature two cast members: Alan Alda and Jimmy Smits. Why, you may ask? They are actually going to do a full out debate in character! It will be great fun. Don't miss it. No word on who the moderator will be yet, but we should only see the 3 of them.

And now the long awaited finale of my premiere season 2005 (minus 24 and The Cobert Report, which won't premiere for awhile)... DISCLAIMER: I did not yet watch tonight's shows so all shows are current through yesterday. From here on out through the rest of the season I will only mention spectacular things about shows.
Commander in Chief (Tuesday, 9pm, ABC)~ Gena Davis stars in this great concept of a woman thrust into presidentcy when the president dies, although it has a weak script. She looks a bit too plastic, still it is enjoyable, and has some great moment. I think I'll give it a fair chance this year. Donald Sutherland also stars as next in line after Davis, and wanting the job.
Boston Legal (Tuesday, 10pm, ABC)~ The opening two parter was enough to satisfy anyone missing the amazing series. Heather Locklear added some fun, the new interns were great (well, the guy was), and Rupert Everett completed the fantastic shows. He even translater 'cello' in court and brought a band to perform for another judge. He will be stealing Rhona Mitra away, who has dropped from the ending credits. And ending with Betty White killing the short guy (a.k.a. Beverly Leslie from Will & Grace) was a nice touch.
Close to Home (Tuesday, 10pm, CBS) ~ I like it. Nice, warm, friendly, and still mysterious. The main character, formerly star of Committed, was great, and I enjoy Christian Kane (Lindsay from Angel) as her husband. Not break out hit, but good.
Night Stalker (Thursday, 9pm, ABC) ~ Bad special affects, bad writing. Stuart Townsend and Gabrielle Union will keep me coming back until it sucks even worse, but it's not great.
Veronice Mars (Wednesday, 9pm, UPN) ~ Great strong start with more murder! Veronica should have died, but I'm glad she didn't! Kevin Smith's guest apperance as a clerk in Week Two was fun, and I look forward to Joss Whedon's car dealership in Week Six. Steve Guttenberg is fun, and Charisma Carpenter is out and out sexy. "Can Beaver and Dick come out and play?" Can't wait for Alyson Hannigan and Charisma to do a scene together.
Alias (Thursday, 8pm, ABC) ~ Strong start. I will miss Michael Vartan, but his death was very emotional. Lisa swears he's not dead, but I don't believe her. I think she's grasping straws. We'll see. I'll also miss Nadia and Weiss, but I look forward to Amy Acker's new role. Now they need Lena Olin and Amanda Foreman back and the show may survive. Here's hoping it doesn't jump the shark.
Will & Grace (Thursday, 8:30, NBC) ~ We all knew the live opening would result in goofs, but it was still cool. I look forward to Harry Connick's return. This final season will probably be all right, although don't look for the best episodes of the series.
Ghost Whisperer (Friday, 8pm, CBS) ~ The surprise breakout hit of the season! It's great! I love it! Only watched it for the eye candy of Jennifer Love Hewitt, but oh so glad I did. I highly recomment to everyone. Every episode will make you cry!
Desperate Housewives (Sunday, 8pm, ABC) ~ In the words of Michael my roommate, we returned to an old friend. Still edgy, still fabulous, still amazing. Bree is definitely shining for me this season, and so if Alfre. Go DW!
Grey's Anatomy (Sunday, 9pm, ABC) ~ Entering it's sophomore year, I can finally enjoy this show. The first season was rough and hard to get into, but it's finding it's groove. I like.
Saturday Night Live (Saturday, 11:30pm, NBC) ~ Steve Carrel hosted, and was not breakout amazing. The best bit was the animation of the plane crashing and everyone running, although second place goes to the impression off between the new guys, and third goes to Mike Myer's appearance. I miss Tina Fey. Horatio was funny despite his best efforts to screw up his lines. We need Tina back! She's had the baby like almost two weeks ago! Get back to work! Sadly, Maya will be joining her soon.
America's Next Top Model ~ Nothing to report. Not great. Not good. I'll watch it cause others are and I'm in the room. Plus reality television, despite sucking, is addicting.
Apprentice: Martha Stewart ~ I didn't watch last night because they moved it to compete with Lost (and Veronica Mars), which is it's death wish. The show is pretty much canelled, which is too bad because for once reality tv was good.

Qop!
"Been more'n a year since I had anything twixt my nethers didn't run on batteries!" ~ Kaylee, Serenity, Awesome Movie! GO SEE!

Don't Throw That In The House!

So you know how your parents never let your throw footballs in the house? Good thing this apartment isn't our parents' house! Last night Phil and I started a rousing game of keepaway from April, then Tim and Kayla joined in in guys vs. girls. It was so much. We played for over an hour. Though there were some close calls, we didn't actually break anything. Tim's mom came over, but though I asked her to, she didn't scold her son. She just laughed at us. Needless to say, the guys won. The girls pulled a view minor victories, and I can't believe April found the ball when we hid it in the refrigerator, but the men were victorious overall. We did out number the girls, but that's beside the point. It was so much fun.

TV Season Finale Updates - West Wing rocked. Of course. Desperate Housewives and Lost did recaps this week. Ugh. Seeing Enterprise on the big screen with Lisa and Michael on the Friday the 13th. 24 this week was so amazing! Chloe kicks ass!!! And Alias was equally enthralling. Elena Derevco (sp?) OMG!?!?!? Can't wait for the return of Lena Olin. That's it for this week

Qop!
"I'm the Slayer...Slay-er. Chosen one? She who hangs out a lot in cemetaries...? 'In every genera-' You know. I really don't feel like doing the routine. Ask around. Look it up: 'Slayer comma The.'"

Ketchup and Kites

I mean catch up, but I like alliteration. Sorry if my haitus has been longer than Desperate Housewives (actually, it hasn't been!) I said last month I wasn't going to hit 10, and I meant it. End of the quarter madness, exams, band tour, and some killer birthday fun all contributed to that. But this month I will hti at least 10. Sweeps are coming up after all. :)

Speaking of television, let's talk new premieres. I give a 3 out of 10 for the premiere of Grey's Anatomy. It really didn't hold my interest. Eyes on the other hand gets like a 9. I loved it. Jake in Progress gets a 7 out of 10 because it if unique. Every time it thinks about getting dirty, it slips back into Full House values. It's odd and I admit a bit refreshing for today's shows. It would have done very well in the late 1980's. We'll see how it fares today. At least it has a good cast. In terms of season finales (yes, some shows are doing them already) Committed's was o.k. It's a decent show, nothing spectacular, but it makes me laugh occasionally. It will be back next season, as will Joey and Will & Grace. The former I am happy to see because it continues to grow in my heart, but the latter, much as I love it, needs to make next season their last and do a nice send off. It should have been this season. The West Wing season finale this week promises to be amazing, and I look forward to the new presidency coming the middle of next year. Enterprise is going off the air with a dudd, much to my disappointment.

Also, please remember the pope and don't be insensitive and use the phrase "Is the pope Catholic?" for at least a couple of weeks. If you want to know how the election of a new pope works, I recommend watching Eurotrip and reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. I'm not kidding. You learn a lot aout the process. It's really pretty neat. Let's just hope a nuclear bomb doesn't mess up the process like in A&D.

Anyway, the reason to write this morning is because Tim bought me a kite for my birthday. Phil and I decided to take it out for a fly this morning. After 45 minutes and our combined brain power we figured out how to put it together and launch it into the air. Ten minutes later the Kite Eating Tree from Peanuts made it's appearance. I tried to climb the tree to get it down. The lower brances weren't even in my reach. I had to jump, grab on, and pull myself up. And I did! By the time I made it to the top of the tree, I was very out of breath and felt totally old. I used to climb tress all the time (see, I'm straight!). I couldn't shake it loose, and the wind kept shaking the thin branches very hard and I almost died. Since Tree Herder wasn't around to help, Phil and I went inside and gave. Amanda Rhymes With Homosexual witnessed the end of these events, and she will attest to their funniness. (Is that a word?) Anyway, I'm going to take some of this free time to watch some TNG. Take care.

Qop! (after Simon Cowell called Ryan Seacrest on American Idol):
RYAN: Pot, kettle, black, boring.

Season Premieres

Ok, I vow to you all to post at least 10 times a month all year (kudos to me if I post 15). So far it is the 10th and this is my 3rd post so I'm not doing too bad, even though it's been a week since my last one. I need to step it up and post every 3rd day. Just to clarify the rules it's 10 posts on 10 different days. No fair of quick posts on same day, although you never know if I might cheat with a little before midnight / after midnight thing. :) Ok, onto this post.

Nick, thank you for your somewhat long but interesting post. I could reciprocate in kind, but I am exhausted and have a hard time narrowing it down. Jersey Girl, Steel Magnolias, AI, Jerry Maguire, and American Wedding certainly all top the list. Addicted to Love and Eternal Sunshine suck though dude! :)

The real point of my post today: Season premieres! They're all in and let's take a quick look at shows just starting or coming back from hiatus:
Joey - Back to it's season with hilarious Lucy Liu. I like this show, but it does lack something. However, it won a People's Choice Award so I think it'll be ok. Most sitcoms start out slow...
Will & Grace - I love this show, but I do hope that next season is it's last. This season so could have been. Getting a little old.
The West Wing - Can I tell you how excited I am about this election? I needed a little pick-me-up after black Tuesday (REMINDER: Wear all black on inaugeration day!) With Leo's heart attack and Donna and Josh quitting, this show just keeps getting better and better. I kind of want the republican Alan Alda to win, but I think Jimmy Smits has it in the bag. Of course, dealing with gay marriage this week, all I have to say is, it's about time. And why can't we elect Jed Bartlett as our real life president?
Lost - just keeps getting better. I love Daniel Dae Kim. I want to see more of his character, and Locke. I swear they're in purgatory!
Desperate Housewives - Oh yeah! Mike is gonna go to jail! :( But can't Terry sing? Oh baby! And she's very hot! :)
Point Pleasant - Premieres next Wednesday, January 19th. Can't wait. The Antichrist. Yikes!
Alias - Great opening! My jaw lie on the floor when Sydney got fired, and I loved Marshall's arrest and "Sloane's here." They so need to bring Weiss in on it. It's gonna kick ass this season. And no matter what anyone says, Irena cannot be dead!
24 - The best opener this season. 4 brand new episodes! How crazy is that? Jack robbing the gas station was great, and I so called the tea as soon as the mother offered to make it. I miss everyone (except Chloe who I hate and wish was gone), but they'd better all come back later this season! How cool would a strike force of Jack, Palmer, Chase, Tony, Michelle, and D.B. Woodside be? I mean seriously.

Also, thanks to all my homies who I watch most of these shows with. They wouldn't be the same without conversations of ice cubes, gasoline, the 24 monarchy, and lyme disease. You all rock!

NEW FEATURE: QUOTE OF THE POST (Or Qop, because it sounds funny):
(From the Bob & Tom Show today: "Budda was too fat to hang on the cross, so they said 'Well, just let him sit quietly.'"

Etc.

So after scanning through everyone's blogs and catching up, instead of going to class, I found I had much more to write about it. I did the Presidential Match thing and got a 66% on Kerry and a 16% on Bush. Tell you what, all you Bush fans. I'll save us both some trouble. Since our votes are going to cancel out each other anyway, you tell me that you're voting for Bush and we'll both stay home. Deal? :) Hey, if you're voting for Bush and only have the brain power he had, you'd fall for that. :) Anyway, I attended the Circleville Pumpkin Show on Friday night and forgot to write about it. Otterbein Marching Band was the featured band this year. We did a concert and basically led the parade. Big whoop. They want us back in 2 years for their big 200th anniversary. We'll see.

Now, onto my geeky things. Lisa put hers out there, so I feel it is only fair.

Shows I am obsessed with: all 5 Star Trek's, especially Deep Space 9. Buffy, Angel, Alias, hopefully soon 24, Lost, & Desperate Houswives. I hate reality television, but am strangely drawn to watching it. I love Joey, Friends, Will & Grace, M*A*S*H, Sports Night, the West Wing, Wonder Years, South Park, Saturday Night Live, Futrama, Family Guy, Dawson's Creek, Boy Meets World, Full House, and I'm sure there are more, including some flops like Cybill, Once & Again, and It's Like, You Know...

Counting each TV Season as one DVD, I own about 400 and they are all categorized and then alphabetized, plus I keep a computer list of title, rating, genra, and major actors as well as photos to prove I own them all for insurance purposes. I have two TVs (one flatscreen), two DVD players, one VCR, and one surround sound system. I am technology obsessed.

I actually identify with Dawson, a fact I am often not proud to admit.

I am anal. Just about myself though, not about others.

I think books are sacred and probably own almost a thousand of them. I want to have a library in my house someday.

I own many, many, many Star Trek collectibles and action figures, including a set of 3 worth several thousand dollars and two big cardboard cutouts of Kirk & Spock from Star Trek V. These are almost all at my parent's house, but I want a Star Trek room in my house too.

I have three large Buffy posters on my apartment bedroom wall, an Enterprise poster in the dining room, and the actual posters that hung in Monica's apartment on Friends in my living room.

I have an almost photographic memory for details, numbers, etc. but I don't remember what I did an hour ago.

I hate drugs. I don't even take Tylenol unless I desperately desperately need it.

I am afraid of becoming an alcoholic because I love it so much. The only other thing I am afraid of is the supernatural. I can handle murders, but keep the ghosts away.

I would never go to war, even if I had to go to Canada.

I have a strange urge to live in the UK for awhile.

When I am in a relationship, I never look at any other girl. This includes celebrities, few of which I find attractive anyway. Plastic is disgusting. Go for the real thing.

A lot of times, I like to isolate myself and feel upset. I do this willingly from time to time because I want to.

Money scares me too. I am getting better about saving, but paying rent and college loans and still buying stuff is scary.

I don't see myself with a bright future. I'm beginning to think my only hope is if people will actually buy the books I am writing.

I am twisted and take great fascination with killing my characters because I know they're fictional. I have drowned people in Roller Coaster Tycoon for fun. Life isn't so meaningless in reality to me. I love people and death makes me very sad.

I am afraid of becoming numb. Sometimes I don't think I feel enough. Perhaps this explain why I willingly isolate myself and make myself upset.

And The End because I am too embarassed to continue.

Britney who?

OK, before I write about my various shows and things, I just have to say please, please, please if you have any sense of decency vote 'no' on Issue One. I mean seriously, who are we kidding? Protecting marriage? Go after Britney Spears-Federline-Whateverthefuckhernameisthisweek. The gays don't threaten marriage! Also, vote for Kerry and vote yes on Issue 106 (the zoo levy).

Ok, so it has been a busy week. I did watch a couple of movies - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and the Tao of Steve. The first one was all right, not as good as I had hoped. The second one rocked and I got a new quote. "Slackers are great. Doing stuff is highly overrated. Look at Hitler. He did lots of stuff, but don't we all wish he would have just sat home and gotten high?" Granted, I don't get high but it was still funny. I just finished my re-watch of Buffy Season 2 with my friends. Yeah, I had forgotten how many times Jonathan was around early on, and how sad the finale of Season 2 really is. On my own time, I am steamrolling through Dawson's Creek Season 4 and with the death of Mr. Brooks and everything, it is getting harder to get through. Also, go Dawson on dating a 21 year old! I dated a 22 year old at 18 and I sometimes get a bit nostalgic for those days. I need to find another older woman to date. :) Anyway, almost done with that and then onto Alias 3! Also, has anyone been taping Desperate Housewives? I really want to watch it.

What's The Opposite of Christopher Reeves?

Ok, ok, I know. I'm going to have to retire that joke now. (The answer was of course, Christopher WALKen). I was deeply saddened by his passing, and I feel very selfish for wondering, what will they do on "Smallville" about his character? Still, he was a great man and I hope that much good comes from his encouragement into research and healing. I was checking out Erin's web site and she's right. A lot of celebrities have died in the past few years. Incredibly sad.

Because I am in a rush, I am not going to take any more time to dwell on death. I haven't posted because of how incredibly busy I've been. I just worked double shifts two days in a row, and now I have a paper due this morning (I woke up at 6:30 am to write it) and an exam in and hour and a half on two books I haven't read (I love the internet for synopsizing books!) Anyway, I wanted to post because I like to keep my readers informed of my life, whether they want to be or not. :) TV wise, I finished Futrama Volume 4 (how sad!) and am getting ready to hit all my recorded shows from the past two weeks and Alias Season 2 some more. BTW, did anyone record Bored Housewives or whatever it's called? I'm hearing about it and now I wanted to see it. Anyway, love life, nothing to report there, but hopefully I'm building up the courage to make a move someday soon towards somebody (could I be more vague? :))

Oh, and now my shameless plug of a new book. It's a textbook called AMERICA: The Book. I read a bit of it and bought it. I LOVE it! Everyone should read this important tome on American history. It's put out by The Daily Show With Jon Stewart. From sarcastic "quotes" of the presidents, to the hilarious forward "by" Thomas Jefferson, to the description of various government offices. It's a must read. It even has that big stamp in the front to write your name and condition of the book and all that in that was in every textbook I had K-12. The only differences is #3 in the fine print, which you'll have to read. Go to page 99 and match the robes with very naked (old, wrinkly, flabby, shiveled up) Justices. Full frontal nudity. In closing, I leave you with a small quote. It's from a small article called "Warren G. Harding: Our Worst President":
"The reasons why he sucked are many, and to be truthful, have been widely cateloged in the annals of presidential history. So, with your indulgence, I'd like to focus instead on the intensity of his sucking.
Warren G. Harding was a worthless piece of shit. Fuck him. His presidency was a taint, not just in the sense of a "stain on the office", but literally a taint - the anatomical area between the anus and the testicles.
I hate Warren G. Harding."

Did I mention that article was by Stephen Colbert, "the Arthur Schlesinger Professor of American Studies at Harvard"?