Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger April 2007 Edition

It's April 2nd, but at least I am posting it this month, as this is only my third TOTHWOTF, and only my second keeping to the schedule. Yay!

Tip of the Hat to Lost
As long as Nikki and Paolo are actually dead. Fantastic episode.
Wag of the Finger to my New Manager at Champps
Learn how to make cuts!!!
Tip of the Hat to Steak Quesadillas
I have been eating these delicious things at Champps after work several times in the last few weeks, and they are quite tasty. Everyone should have some.
Wag of My Finger to Network Television
Every year they tease us with tantalizing morsels of good television, such as The Winner, Eyes, The Nine, and Reunion, and then they yank the plug. Some they even let on go long enough for me to fall in love with like What About Brian?, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, and The Class. How dare you take away my shows and replace them with shit like Two & A Half Men!!!
Tip of My Hat to Congress
For finally passing a budget that stipulates a pullout from Iraq. Yes, I know it's a mess, but it's over, we can't do any more good without doubling our troops, and no one wants that. Give it up. We're done. Let us go home.
Wag of My Finger to Congress
Since only just over half of you are willing to pass the aforementioned law, you won't be able to overturn Premiere Dictator Bush's veto. Shame on you lame Congressional Republicans!
Tip of the Hat to China
Even though you have been rated our biggest threat for about the last decade, if not longer, you haven't attacked us yet. Thank you!
Wag of My Finger to Paper Cuts
You are small and insignificant. Quit hurting so badly! It's just not fair!

Qops! (from American Dad!)
Steve Smith: I touched her hand, her hand touched her boob. By the transitive property, I touched her boob! Algebra's awesome!

Roger the Alien: Is that a Chinese baby?
Stanley Smith: Sure is! Japanese, to be specific.

Stanley Smith: Son, if you ever get captured by any terrorists in the neighborhood and end up on al-Jazeera, just blink you location in Morse code. I'll have a bomb dropped on your location immediately.
Steve Smith: But, Dad, then I'd get killed too.
Stanley Smith: Ah, come on son, there are plenty of kids to play with in heaven. Your cousin Billy. That little girl from Poltergeist. She must be about 16 by now, you could totally tap that.

Hayley Smith: My mother stole my boyfriend!
Stanley Smith: And your boyfriend stole my wife! Let's get back at them by dating each other! Wait a minute... Daddy didn't think that one through.

Frozen Beverages

I love frozen beverages. Who doesn't? I always have, from my first Icee or milkshake, to my most recent daiquiri or mudslide. Any one is tasty, even in cold weather, and I indulge from time to time. My problem is that I can never make a truly great one at home. I can do all right with a blender, but they just don't have the consistency to be really really great. You would think with today's technology, and the fact that frozen beverages are not a new invention, that an easy-to-use machine would be available for the general public. Or has there not been enough demand for one? And if so, why not? I, at some point in the next few years, will probably invest in an industrial style drink mixer, so that my frozen beverages will be close to the real thing. But will I ever accomplish my goal of making restaurant or bar quality beverages at home? I don't know.

Qop! (The Nine, Kim Raver & Tim Daly)
Kathryn Hale: Guess we go back to our lives, then...
Nick Cavanaugh: I guess so

Grey's Anatomy Spinoff

I have been getting more and more excited about the new Grey's Anatomy spin off. I love the show, and I can't wait for a double helping every week. Luckily, in the next 3 or 4 episodes before they do the two hour finale slash spin off pilot, there will be some more great things, including a new doctor, and Shoresh Adshaloo, or whatever her name is. I adored her on 24, X-Men 3, and The Exorcism of Emily Rose. And Callie (Tony award winning actress Sara Ramirez) will supposedly be discovered to be a lounge singer during her off shifts from the hospital. Yay! The bad thing is, the cast is supposedly up in arms that Addison got the spin off. They all wanted it. Oh, well. Now for the Top Ten Reasons I'm excited about the new Grey's Anatomy spin off. Most reference actors cast to star in the new show.
10. Chris Lowell... this actor has been so barely used on Veronica Mars this season that I have no idea if he's any good or not.
9. Merrin Dungey... although I was never a big fan of Francie on Alias, it's cool that she's been cast. Maybe I'll like her more this time.
8. Amy Brenneman... Star of Judging Amy and NYPD Blue, I never watched either. I hear she's great. Can't wait to see her.
7. I'm bound to learn to do some medical procedures if I keep watching this stuff.
6. No Meredith. That will make me smile. Meredith can be pretty lame.
5. Kate Walsh is like my favorite Grey's Anatomy star. If anyone deserves the spin off, it's her.
4. Lisa Kudrow... Who doesn't like Phoebe from Friends, or the numerous movie and other tv roles that Lisa has played? It surprises me that she has signed on to star, but I'm ok with it.
3. Marti Noxon... She helped Joss keep Buffy and Angel both high quality shows. I'm sure she can help Shonda do the same.
2. Tim Daly... I was so disappointed when Eyes and The Nine flopped, because I love Tim Daly, and I loved both shows. It's about time he was attached to a winning project. He's being billed at McDreamy 2.0 and a love interest for Addison.
1. Have you read that all star lineup I just talked about? Yeah, enough said. Grey's Anatomy as if it had been made with big names. It's got to do well.

Qop! (from Eyes, which I guess aired the rest of their season one from spring 2005 these past few months, but I missed them :()
Meg Bardo: Sir, with a soundproof room, a butane lighter and a pair of pliers, I'll get him to tell where that girl is.
Chris Didion: Well, be all that you can be.
Meg Bardo: Yes, sir.
Chris Didion: Let's keep that for the backup plan.
Meg Bardo: Right.

Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger: Entertainment Edition

Tip of the Hat
To The Nine. This show has just gotten better and better every week. John Billingsly is the best part, although I have ti say that Tim Daly and Kim Raver keep me hooked, too. I really hope this show goes on for a nice, long while. And Joshua Malina rocks, too.
Wag of the Finger
The Red Hot Chili Peppers. I'm not a sports fan, but you don't play the Michigan fight song to a booing crowd in Columbus. They should never even try to seel another album in this town.
Tip of the Hat
To Barry Manilow for giving Stephen Colbert joint custody of the emmy, and signing a notorized contract on The Colbert Report. Also, letting Stephen take the lead in the duet was classy.
Wag of the Finger
To the Barenaked Ladies for not playing "Fun & Games" as their fantastic concert last night. They played in the venue Jon Stewart had been in the night before. This is Ohio, the most important state in the election. And they didn't play their anti-Bush song. What better time for it?
Tip of the Hat
Tyler of BNL for that fantastic rendering of Feliz Halloween. Prospero ano y felici-bean.
Wag of the Finger
To Jon Stewart for having Lebron James, James Mueller, and NOT James Dailey. If you come to town and do a James theme, why not me? :)

Qop! (South Park Season 10 - more to come when IMDB posts newest episodes)
Stan: He was right, you did cause 9-11.
George W. Bush: Yes. Quite simple to pull off, really. All I had to do was have explosives planted at the base of the towers, then on 9-11 we pretended like four planes were being hijacked when really we just rerouted them to Pennsylvania then flew two military jets into the World Trade Center filled with more explosives and shot down all the witnesses in Flight 93 with an F-15 after blowing up the pentagon with a cruise missile. It was only the world's most intricate and flawlessly executed planm ever, ever.
Kyle: [disbelieving] Really?
Stan: Why?
George W. Bush: The oldest reason in the world: money. The towers fell and the American sheeple all waved their flags. Finally we could invade Iraq and get the oil which made us all even richer than before.
Donald Rumsfeld: Beautiful money. Ha ha ha!
Kyle: [even more disbelieving] Really?
Stan: Is the whole government in on this?
George W. Bush: We are all knowing and all powerful. Good-bye boys.
Dick Cheney: [shoots an arrow and misses the boys] Dang it, I missed again.
George W. Bush: For Christ's sake, Cheney.
Stan: Kyle, run!

DJ

In my last post, I vowed a weekly WOTF, TOTH. By weekly, I of course meant monthly, because sometimes I don't even post weekly. So look for the next installment in about 2-3 weeks. :) On books, though, I have gotten so much work done for the second installment of An Actor's Nightmare, due out in roughly six weeks. Thank you Nick from the bottom of my shoes for his work on the cover design. It is awesome! I can't wait for everyone to see it! Also, the first bimonthly short story is on schedule for a November 1st release, if I can contain my enthusiasm until then. Unlike my blog, the book is always ahead of schedule and up on time. I am also finding some time, albeit a little, to keep up on some of my shows. I have to say The Nine and Six Degrees are two fantastic new shows. Anyway, time to go once more, so until next time, I bid you adieu.

Qop! (from Boston Legal)
You hear the one about the fella who died, went to the pearly gates? St. Peter let him in. Sees a guy in a suit making a closing argument. Says, "Who's that?" St. Peter says, "Oh, that's God. Thinks he's Denny Crane."