Other Sources

Dear Readers,

     I no longer keep a personal blog.  However, I have been a very active television review for the past year.  If you are interested in reading my articles, please go to http://jeromewetzeltv.blogspot.com  This site is updated many times per week, and will continue to be for the forseeable future.

      Thank you,
    James Dailey a.k.a. Jerome Wetzel

Where Have I Been? And When Will I Be Back?

I do apologize for my absence in the blogging world. Things have been busy, and the time I used to have set aside for regular blogging dried up. Also, much of my blogging was television review. All my reviews have continued with the podcast Geek Out With Jimmy!. Subscribe to it on iTunes!
Anyway, while I don't plan on bringing my reviews back to this site, except on very rare occasion, events in my life will be changing soon, and I will see those of you that read this a lot less. Which is saying something, to some of you. I will be getting married and moving to Kentucky or somewhere (we think). So this blog will return as a way to keep in touch and keep you informed, though it won't be all dry and boring. It will be amusing and enlightening and philosophical. If I can get even one of those in each post, I'd be elated.

In conclusion, this blog returns in LATE SUMMER 2009!!!

D4K Issue 11 is coming along

Hey everyone, I'm hijacking Jimmy's Blog for two seconds to tell you that Issue 11 is coming along

Indecision 2008

Indecision 2008. Yes, yes, I stole my posting title from Comedy Central. So sue me. No, actually, please don't. I'm not worth anything. While my bank account is not negative, my student loans and car loan make my worth negative, so please don't, and besides, I don't make any money at all from this blog. Anyway, this election year is turning out to be quite exciting. Who would have though a year ago, when faced with a field of 20 candidates, none of whom stood out to me, we'd be left with three good ones?
First, we have John McCain. Lambasted by conservatives, McCain may be arguably be NOT the most Republican of the trio, which is funny, since he's their nominee. I actually like this man because he reaches across the aisle, wants to unite the country and acts likes it, not just says it, and he seems like he really cares. I can get behind his passion. On the negative side, even throwing out his endorsement by idiot-worst president ever-George W. Bush, he doesn't want to pull out of Iraq. I understand why. That place will go to hell even more than it already is if we leave, but after being falsely led over there, it's time to end it.
Second up, there's Barack Obama. The first guy this year I actually got behind, he is the leading Democrat. Who can resist his message of hope and change? After reading his last book, I saw him as too Mr. Smith goes to Washington, too naive to get anything done. Watching him in the debates, I changed my mind. He's not just cool and passionate, he sounds like he would actually do a great job. So let's all get behind him and vote for him in November.
No, wait, I'm leaving someone out. Hillary Clinton was all but counted out by her resurgence this week. Now I'm feeling sorry for her, and wondering whether I was too hasty to toss her away. After all, her and her husband led this country through eight golden years, economically speaking. And we all know the economy could use a boost. Plus SNL's seeming-endorsement and Tina Fey speaking up for her made me start to like her again. Should we be looking for a Hillary White House? I just don't know. IS bitch the new black?
Either way this goes, we're going to have someone good. Let's just hope they become great.

Qop!
"She is a bitch. So what? So am I. Bitches get stuff done. That's why Catholic Schools use nuns instead of priests... At the end of the year you hated those bitches, but you knew the capital of Vermont." ~ Tina Fey on Hillary Clinton, Saturday Night Live

Blah Blahbity Blah Blah Blah

So much has gone in the last few months, I don't know where to start. I am no longer the lonely pathetic man that most of you know me to be. :) I also have been working a lot, and career prospects are looking up. On top of that, the podcast continues to grow, and I've been hard at work on my next book, the short story collection. I am generally pretty happy and busy, and I miss those friends I have had so little contact with due to our conflicting schedules.

Speaking of missed friends, my friend Jonathan Stewart reminded me that I never wrote a review of Center Stage Player's Rocky Horror Show in October. it was FANTASTIC!!!! I saw it twice! Esther Stinson rocked the stage as Magenta. Jonathan wore a ridiculously cool costume leading the band, and Michael Newsome directed it wonderfully. I can't remember what Mary Sink did, but I remember she did it well, and that she was backstage. Ed Eblin cracked me up as the narrator. I wish I could write in more detail, but it has been a long time. I can't wait for the show next year, as well as the shows the company will do before then, because they always do a great job.

Ohio primary elections are today. I slept through four alarms, even though I set them early and went to bed early. I was actually late for work this morning, although not late enough to matter, they didn't care. But I had planned on going to vote before school. I have to go straight to my second job this evening, so I won't get to vote. Those of you who know me know that I am deeply disappointed. I follow the political stage quite loyally. Oh, well. This sucks.

I saw The Other Boleyn Girl this weekend. For my review of that, the season finale of Project Runway, New Amsterdam, and other stuff, check out the podcast I host, The Good, The Bad, & The Geeky at www.dribbleforkids.com/GBG or on iTunes.

Speaking of the podcast, my cohost Nick will be at MegaCon in Orlando, FL this weekend so Jon and I will be doing it without him, though we hope to have a guest fill in. I was not able to attend the convention, but my books are on sale there, and so is a new short story! Well, the short story is free. But only convention attendees will be able to get it, unless you personally know me and ask me nicely. :)

No Qop this time as the post is already too long, but expect another one soon!

January 2008

I fully expected to update this blog more often once my student teaching was done, but now I wonder if I ever will update as often as I once did. Probably not. Things have been very busy. I am still teaching, and working another job, and trying to have a social life. I have also been updating my web site frequently with reviews. Check them out! There are also plenty of new episodes of The Good, The Bad, & The Geeky, which is a great podcast! It has really been growing and solidifying what it is. There are now three hosts, including Jon. I'm sorry I don't have anything real to post here. I'm looking very forward to the season premiere of Lost on Thursday. If you know me, feel free to call me about coming over for it. There'll probably be a few people here. And that's, um, yeah that's all for now. I'll post something more fun soon. Have a good week, loyal readers!

Qop!
"Sir, there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder." ~ Spock, fooling a guard, Star Trek

Iowa Caucus

The votes are in, and I am encouraged. Michael Moore says that because almost twice the Democrats showed up to the primary as Republicans, Iowa, a traditionally Republican state, will go blue in November. I am not willing to read that much into it, but it was encouraging. Participation in the caucus was up by 93% from 2004, and 2004 was a record year.
Huckabee won the Republican side, and I'm good with that. I like Huckabee, sort of. I was just disappointed that Romney got second because I don't like him. And I was very disappointed in McCain's fourth place finish. I hope he rebounds in New Hampshire.
Obama won the Democrat side. I like Obama, I would just rather he was the Vice candidate. I read his last book, and it was very Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. I like that Edwards has rebounded to second, and Hilary took a third. I'm not a huge fan of Hilary. Biden dropped out, which is a little sad, but he's been done for awhile, so it was inevitable.
As primary season kicks off, I still haven't picked a candidate, or even a party. This is such a clusterfuck race, I don't even know what to think. One thing is for sure though, it'll be an interesting election year.

Happy 2008!

This is the first post in a long while, and the first of the new year. Now that student teaching is over, I hope to be updating this blog once or twice a week again. Thank you all for bearing with me during my hiatus, and hope you will come back now that I have returned. I was on break from many things, not just the blog, but there is still new material on www.actorsnightmare.com with more to come later this week. Check it out for the latest content from me, as well as our weekly podcast, which is also available on iTunes. There is also a short film on that web site that Nick and I did for the holidays entitled The Apartment. Check it out.

MY TOP TEN TELEVISION PREMIERS OF 2007:
10. Life
9. The Big Bang Theory
8. Chuck
7. Private Practice
6. Reaper
5. Hidden Palms
4. Pushing Daisies
3. Dirty Sexy Money
2. Gossip Girl
1. Damages

Qop! (Pushing Daisies)
Chuck: You can't just touch someone's life and be done with it.
Ned: Yes, I can. That's how I roll.

Damages

I'm sure you people that still check this blog are getting tired of the very rare updates and vows to fix that. I truly will, come December, when student teaching is over, and I can afford to have a life again. Until then, I am behind on everything. It's already the 25th of the month and I haven't even started my short story for my book web site. I know, I know. I'm terrible. But I will prevail, and after December, you will feel my presence. Until then, if you want your regular does of Jimmy, check out the podcast I do with Nick Nitro, The Good, The Bad, & The Geeky. We update every week. We didn't always, but we have kept that schedule for a month or so, and we do intend to keep it going. It's really taking off. You can find it on iTunes, or at the show's web site. It's really something, I think, and we have lots more surprises in store for our loyal listeners! And yes, An Actor's Nightmare Book 3 will be out soon.

What could possibly break my once-again lengthy code of silence on the blog? Every once in awhile, a show comes along that just completely wows you. I mean, really. I know I like lots of shows, but the ones that join my top tier are few and far between. We're talking your Buffy the Vampire Slayers, your Deep Space Nines, your Sports Nights. Shows unique in nature, and long lasting in mind. The newest to join that rank: the first year drama Damages, which just completed its initial run on FX. While the show has not yet been picked up for a second season, they should just hand the Emmy and the Golden Globe to Glenn Close. While they're at it, give a supporting actor nod to Zeljko Ivanek (Live Free or Die Hard, Oz, The Manchurian Candidate). Rose Byrne stars, and Ted Danson and Tate Donavan round out the actors you need to know. I haven't watched the finale, it's paused on my tv screen right now, but I know without a doubt it will finish strong.

The show began in the summer, with poor Ellen (Byrne) in a trench coat covered in blood on a dark street. Over the ensuing thirteen weeks, we soon learned that her fiance was dead, and her boss, Patty Hughes (Close), may have tried to kill them both. Most of the story takes place in the months leading up to that fateful scenes as Patty and Ellen attempt to make a case against Ted Danson, but the action catches up the opening by the penultimate episode. I have much to say about this show, and will this Sunday on our podcast, but I can delay my anticipation no longer. It's on to the finale!

Qop!
"I predict that by the time I get back, you and David will be together again." ~ Patty Hughes (Glenn Close) to Ellen (Rose Byrne), Damages

I Broke My Pledge

Yeah, sorry. I let it go another two weeks and didn't do my Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger. I've decided not to make any more promises about posting until student teaching is over, because as much as I'd like to keep them, I'm not sure I can. And now for some brief random thoughts that should have been on our podcast, The Good, The Bad, & The Geeky, but wasn't.
Did anyone watch Saturday Night Live this past weekend? Chevy Chase on freakin' Weekend Update! How cool was that!!!!
When did Heroes become Star Trek? I mean, yes, shows have had lots of ST people before, from the tv movie Roots: The Gift which featured many ST actors before they were ST actors, and Boston Legal, which starred two major ST alumni, but Heroes got crazy! First they had George Takei (Sulu), whom they recently killed off. And then the villain, Sylar, was cast to play Spock in the new movie. Then last night, Nichelle Nichols (Uhura) showed up, and she will surely be seen again, and Dominic Keeting (Reed from Enterprise) was there, too! It's getting crazy up in here!

Qop!
"I'm still...and you're still not." ~ Chevy Chase, SNL

It's Only Been Two Weeks

I'm sorry guys, but this time it's only been two weeks! I did much worse over the summer. I also pledge to return to the Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger posts in October. But for now I just want to mention how much I love student teaching! Don't get me wrong, I really wish I was getting paid, but in the past year I started to doubt if I even wanted to teach. However, with the school that I am at, the staff I am working with, and especially my mentor teacher, I am having a really good time. I can't wait to have my own classroom! It would be even better if it was at this school I am at now, but that's beside the point. I am just having a great time.
In the meantime, I am busting my ass to finish Book Three and get it out on time. I am still doing my last run through, but with my student teaching, part time job, etc., I haven't had a lot of time. Plus all of that tv I have to watch for our iTunes podcast, The Good, The Bad, and The Geeky. You should definitely check it out.
Anyway, I have to go clean and do homework. Lisa, Joe, and the gang are coming over for the season premiere of Heroes, so until next time, Bye!

Qop! (Freakazoid, how Nick ends TGTBATG)
"Get out of here with that cheese! You're a creep! Go away! We're having a good time, I tell you, %&#$&%$! Go have some coffee with some cream or something! Because I tell you something, this is a happy place!"

Back to School

So I began my final leg of my grad school work towards getting my PreK-3 teaching license today. Yes, that's right folks, student teaching. I'm a bit old to be a student teacher, in my opinion, but that's ok. Yes, thirteen weeks seems excessive for someone who has already logged a year and a half in the classroom as a substitute. But it's not like I have a choice. Luckily, I am in my favorite school that I sub for, with a fantastic teacher. I am in a third grade classroom, and from what I've seen so far, the kids are wonderful. I tried all morning to memorize their names, and by lunch I had them, which is amazing, because I am terrible with names. However, I will be spending sixty days with these kids, so it's good that I know them. I am really looking forward to it.

By the way, did anyone know there was a television show called "Ferris Bueller" in 1990 that ran for half a season? That's right. Jennifer Aniston played Bueller's sister, Jennifer Grey's character from the film. The other actors were also NOT the ones from the movie.


Also, Otterbein Alumni Book Club meets this Wednesday in the back room of Graeter's to talk about Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Be there!

Qop!
Ferris: Look, it's real simple. Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off.
Cameron: How?
Ferris: We'll drive home backwards.

Slang

It is interesting to me how slang changes. I am thinking of it because I was inputting the last comments of two of my editors, Lois and Nancy, in Book Three (due out in late October). I smile every time I see them circle and put question marks next to phrases that seem second nature to me. Two in particular I saw today were "Pathetic much?" and "It is so on." It amuses me that these simple things confuse them, having not heard them before. I guess that it part of the generational gap. Of course certain slang words like cool and such make it into the popular lexicon, but certain phrasing remains isolated, sometimes even to an area or group of people, long before it becomes common knowledge. Things I have said since high school sound strange and foreign to people when they first hear them. It makes me a little self-conscious, as my books are set about another generation or two into the future and I have not given them their own little language quirks; I've merely used the ones I know. Also, will people reading this a few years down the road even understand what I mean? Will they just be confused as my editors are and think that there are typos? I don't know, but that's ok. I don't plan on stopping the slang. I think it adds to the characters and gives them a distinct voice. And that is really all that matters.

Qop! (Randal Graves played by Jeff Anderson in Clerks the cartoon)
[opening argument to the all-black jury of NBA players] Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Dante Hicks is just like you. He lurves grape soda. He knows what it's like when the guy at the supermarket won't take your "food stamps". Or how it feels to wait all month for your "welfare check". [waving his arms from side to side] Hey! Ho! Hey! Ho! Thank you.

Alone

So I live alone now. This is, admittedly, probably a temporary situation. I have a roommate lined up for November, a possible one for December, and then maybe another one for next year. This is met with mixed feelings by me, honestly. I have only lived alone for two months. I like it a lot of the time. I can walk around, er, less than fully dressed. The temperature is what I want it set to. I can stay up late or go to bed early. The tv is always mine. Hell, every room in the house is mine. Yet, as I empty out the spare bedroom, that only had clothes and a bed in it anyway, in anticipation of the roommate coming in two months, I do feel a little happy. For one thing, I like to see people. And when I'm home alone all day, and every night, it gets lonely and sad. I think I would like a roommate. I think I would also like a bigger place to share with them, because while this place is big for me, it will not be big for two people. I use every inch in it except the spare room and a few kitchen cabinets. Ah, well. The mixed bag will stay for awhile now, and likely I won't be with roommate for long.

Qop! (this one's for you, Nick!)
"My name is Wil Wheaton. Jack Thompson can suck my balls. If you have a problem with that, go fuck yourself." ~ Wil Wheaton, Pax 07 Keynote Address

I'm off to see the Whizard

I am heading up to Ashland University today to see the campus briefly. I technically have been an Ashland student for just over a year now, and will only be one for a few short months. Yet, I have never seen the main campus. I go to a small, square building in Columbus just down the street from where I live. It seems strange to me that I have no idea what the place looks like. I do think their colors, purple and yellow, may be slightly less attractive than my undergard alum's red and tan. I don't particularly like either color scheme, but oh, well. Take what you get. Anyway, I am off to a world unknown. When I return, I will have seen wonders that I never dreamed or some such like that. Bon Voyage!

P.S. Yes, I'm just trying to get as many posts as I can in while I still have time. Enjoy!

Qops! (from the movie Strangers With Candy ~ Amy Sedars as Jerri, Stephen Colbert as Chuck, Paul Dinello as Geoffrey, Greg Hollimon as Blackman, Sarah Jessica Parker as Peggy, Debra Rush as Sara, and Joseph Cross as Derrik)
Geoffrey Jellineck: You pushed me away!
Chuck Noblet: I wasn't pushing you away, I was pulling me toward myself.

Jerri Blank: Faggot.
Chuck Noblet: What did you say?
Jerri Blank: What did you hear?
Chuck Noblet: I'd rather not repeat it.
Jerri Blank: Then I guess we'll never know.

Principal Blackman: Why would I doctor the books to improve the overall test scores of the student body just so I could collect bonus funds from the state which I willfully misappropriated in order to pay off large gambling debts? It just doesn't add up, Blank!

Derrick Blank: The coach made me co-captain of the junior varsity squat thrust team!
Jerri Blank: Way to go, faglick.
Sara Blank: Jerri, language!
Derrick Blank: I'll have you know, stump, that the varsity squat thrust team took third in all conference.
Jerri Blank: And how does that make you not gay?
Derrick Blank: What are you talking about, troll? We squat together, we spot each other on the workout mat, and we play grab-ass in the showers. How is that gay?

Jerri Blank: I'm Jerri Blank and my daddy's in a coma.
Grief Counselor Peggy Callas: You know what, Jerri? I wish my daddy was in a coma. He's dead, Jerri. He was executed for war crimes, but for insurance purposes, we say he was eaten by wolves. Anyway, my point is, Jerri, somebody's always got it worse.

Chuck Noblet: It's over.
Geoffrey Jellineck: What are you saying, Chuck?
Chuck Noblet: I need more out of this relationship than I'm willing to put in. I think I deserve better, don't you? Hey, I know this is hard on you. It would be hard on me, too, if I broke up with me. I know what you're losing.

I Dreamed a Dream

Yes, yes, I just blogged yesterday and you are not used to me blogging, as I have been slacking for several months. I have many blog ideas in me, however, and only a short time until the last few months seem like cake compared to the busy schedule coming, so why not post now? Those friends of mine that have blogs, I promise to link to you soon, but I only have 15 minutes before I have to go back and work the second half of my double shift, so it won't happen today. Sorry.

A few nights ago I had one of my strangest dreams yet. I dreamed I was at a church, and many of my close friends and family were there. That was weird, because I avoid church like the plague. Then I saw my friend Abby from Champps in a wedding dress. Weird, right? Even weirder, I soon found a program that said Abby's wedding was at 1pm and mine was at 4pm. There were lots of details I have mulled over, but the biggest that gets to me is that in my dream, I couldn't remember my bride's name. I remember thinking I was so nervous I forgot who I was marrying. Is it a sign that I need slow down, that I may marry the next girl I date? Or is it a sign that I'm not ready to be married, though I maintain that I have been ready since Kindergarten? Or is it a sign of impending nuptials? Or does it just show how desperate I sometimes am to find that one person for me? Or is it just a meaningless dream? I don't know, but it disturbed me and I spent much effort thinking about it for days afterwards. A wedding is in my not so distant future, I hope, but I haven't even been in a relationship for over four years. Oh, well. How does that help me now? It doesn't. So back to my dull and busy life, back to the things I don't want to do with the hope that if I do them now, I can afford to do what I want to do in the future.

Qop!
"Everything in life is only for now." ~ Avenue Q

Welcome Back, Wetzel

Taking a cue from my good friend Mr. Kotter, I welcome you all back to a new edition of my blog! The summer is over for me, and as such I promise regular updates of at least once a week. I'd love to do them more often, but things are about to get even more busy for me, if that is possible. I would love to tell you all about my summer, such as all the hours worked and class took, but that would be boring. Instead, I present 7 Fun Things That Happened to me!

1. I played duck-duck-goose with adults. Yes, adults. No, not those young adults in their twenties, but real adults whose age ranged from late 30's up into the 60's. It was quite fun. My family rocks. And are creative on getting a seat when there aren't enough chairs around the campfire.
2. I saw Jonathan star in Bye Bye Birdie. Yes, I mentioned this before, but it bears repeating He did a really great job, and it was really cool.
3. I drove Lisa to and from her job a few times. This was fun because I got to see her. I did hang out with her a couple of times that weren't job related, but I enjoyed those drives and frozen beverages.
4. Karoke night at Havana was also fun. Again, Lisa was involved, as were Joe, Mary, Esther, Cindy, Evan, and many others. I'm not a great singer, but I appreciate their encouragement and support. I look forward to more fun nights with them soon.
5. I watched lots of Gilmore Girls with Amanda and sometimes Andrea. Amanda sat through 12 seasons of Buffy and Angel with me, and this was her TV pick. We're late into Season 4 now, and I'm really enjoying it.
6. I went drinking with my Champps coworkers plenty of times. This was much fun.
7. I got a new kitten less than two weeks ago. His name is Snugglebunny Fucktard. Thanks to my brother David for helping me name him. Pics and stories of S.F. to come soon.

Qop!
"Up your nose with a rubber hose!" ~ Various characters from Welcome Back Kotter!

Bye Bye Birdie

For those of you who haven't noticed, while I never did post an official announcement, I have been on summer hiatus for the last two months. I have been extremely busy with work, school, moving, etc. I am very sorry if you missed me. By the way, very funny post here from Nick a few days ago. Scroll down and check it out. Thanks, Nick. I do not promise regular updates in August, either, but come September, I will be back in full force. I'll do an extra special Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger when I return.
But what could possibly bring me away from my lovely, and busy, summer to post? Is it Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows? Nah, I covered that in our podcast, available through iTunes, The Good, The Bad, and The Geeky, which is not on summer hiatus. Could it be the discovery of adult flushable wipes, making toilet paper nearly obsolete? Nah, I've already told everyone I know about that. It's the summer musical Bye Bye Birdie by Center Stage Players! They perform at Axis downtown, and the show runs through next weekend. I highly recommend checking it out. And so, by popular demand, I break my break to give you My Review!
This was a fantastic show, from the chorus to the star. Mary Sink was a notable member of the chorus, and she was always worth keeping an eye on while onstage. So was Nikki, a character I had never heard of before, a gay male member of the all-girl Conrad Birdie fan club. Greg Holcombe was a natural for birdie, and R. Neil Palik and Emily Wise as the MacAfees kept me rolling. Equally fun were the kids, Nick Villilo, Zachary Justus, and especially Emily Edwards. They made Randolph, Hugo, and Kim come to life! I defintiely believed Emily's performance, and she perfectly balanced her love for Hugo and lust for Conrad. Kristin Gloege as Gloria and Jessica Hanley as Ursula were a delight, and Amber Thompson was also good as Rose. Stealing the show was Joanna Vansickle as Mae Peterson. I've seen several versions, and that character is always fun, but it was great joy to watch Joanna. And of course, the star of the show, my good friend Jonathan Stewart was Albert. He was awesome! Really a good chance to shine. From his facial expressions during "Put on a Happy Face", to his corny improved line, "Rose, I wish I knew how to quit you." kept me highly entertained. I was very impressed by him in this performance. As I said, the show is still running, so go check it out!

Qop! (Albert from Bye Bye Birdie, as portrayed by Jonathan Stewart in a slightly adjusted line)
" He's as sober as a judge! He subscribes to ev'ry charity! And his hobby's packing fudge!"

This Space For Rent

If this space seems interesting to you, and you would like to buy this space for a small fee, then please contact me. I greatly wish to be used. I feel unloved, un-used and need some attention.

I will even house pictures of naughtiness; that is how desperate for attention I am.

All prospective renters apply inside.

Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger June 2007 Edition

TIP OF MY HAT TO iTUNES
For finally letting me get some music that's not locked out of every other program. Hurry up and finish the library please! Copyrights are for pussies. Except for my books. Then copyright rocks.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO OUR JUSTICE SYSTEM
Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that Paris Hilton and Scooter Libby don't belong in jail. But while they're there, who are we going to be pissed off at for acting like total buffons and getting away with everything? It takes away the righteous indignation.
TIP OF MY HAT TO THE LAUGH FACTORY
For enslaving Jon Lovitz in Hollywood and spinning it as a good thing, when he got his record breaking contract that means he will perform every Wednesday night there until he dies.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO ABC
I don't want to wait until December for the latest seasons of Lost and Grey's Anatomy to come out on DVD. And the price increase? What were you thinking???
TIP OF MY HAT TO MERCURY
Despite recent worries, it turns out you haven't been poising us lately. Good for you.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO NON-SLIP SHOES
What do you have that my regular shoes don't? Special gripping action? Ha! Just because you keep from falling down, does that make you think you're better than other shoes?
TIP OF MY HAT TO OIL COMPANIES
Some people actually like being anally raped. On behalf of them, I thank you.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO THE GILMORE GIRLS
For being oh so seductively funny, and hooking me into yet another show. At least they're off the air and have a finite number of episodes. You evil temptresses.
TIP OF MY HAT TO YOUR MOM
It's nice that she's going to college. She can better herself there, and get plastered, making it much easier for me to sleep with her.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO COOL, JUNE DAYS
It's just not fair! You know how much I hate the heat, and you tease me, make me think that maybe this summer won't be so hot. But it will be!

Lots of Sunshine

Those of you who know me, know that I dislike being outside when it's very hot, especially without a good reason. And standing around watching people have fun is not a good reason. :) Search has been my lot for three days of the past six. I won't go into details, but thank goodness it won't continue. I HATE humidity. That's not to say I don't like to be outside. There are lots of fun things to do outside. I just hate being hot. It's why summer is my least favorite season.
Anyway, Memorial Day was great. We had a big family part at the 'rents' house. Lots of food and good times, and corn hole. Someone was even given the nickname 'The Hole', which I think was rather risque, but that's my family for you.
My mother decided to help one of her nieces get even with her older sister (the kids in question here are in Kindergarten and Fourth grade) by getting some water balloons. They all had a little fun tossing some balloons. Then my 17 year old brother Bob told me he needed my help. I said ok, as long as I don't get wet. He assured me I wouldn't. At first, his plan seemed sound. He and I help up two sides of a big slingshot, while another little cousin pulled it to the ground. The balloons sailed over the house and hit the unsuspecting people in the backyard. And the house is TALL, yet they did make it over. Well, mostly they missed people. But there was intent. Then my Uncle Joe, age 35 going on 11, the youngest of my mom's five siblings, comes running around the house and hits...you guess it...ME with a balloon! My shorts were soaked! So I helped them finish off the bucket, saving one balloon for myself. I start to run towards the backyard, payback on my mind, when my uncle comes running around, too, only feet in front of me. Direct hit to the chest! I left a welt. Oops. No hard feelings, though. Then my brother David, age nineteen, sprays me down with a hose, voiding the me not getting wet further. I managed to get the hose and soak David back. Lots of water was tossed around, and my uncle and I both ended up changing clothes, but it was a good time.

Qop! (from Kitchen Confidential)
Jack Bourdain: Tanya, let's talk. Let me start by saying you're very sweet and stylish. One might say that you... you put the "ho" in "hostess."
Tanya: Why, thank you!

To Boldly Go

It's time for a big shift in gears in An Actor's Nightmare. For those of you who haven't known me forever, actors_nightmare@hotmail.com was an e-mail address I registered in SIXTH GRADE, many years ago. Around that time I launched a series of short comedy stories called Star Wreck: An Actor's Nightmare. Star Wreck became an important part of the now defunct UFK. Other stories were also written and posted, but that project was abandoned years ago. After many more years and several false starts, An Actor's Nightmare reemerged in 2003 an idea, and in early 2004 there was a webcomic. The animation was crappy, and the story was a little cheesy, but many of those first thirty or so pages made their way into the first few chapters of a book, called appropriately enough, An Actor's Nightmare Book One, published in 2005. This was quickly followed by An Actor's Nightmare Book Two in 2006, and the launch of Actor's Nightmare EXtra online.

The next year and a half is going to be big for An Actor's Nightmare. Book Three will be out around October, and ANEX stories will be posted through the end of the year, and beyond. I will be attending a convention in Columbus, OH over Thanksgiving weekend. An issue of Dribble for Kids (a popular webcomic by Nick Arganbright) written by me will begin appearing in the fall. Also, the online sitcom (text only) Excerpts From the Morning Show will premiere in September. By summer 2008, the paperback ANEX Volume One should be out with eighteen short stories (seven of which have never been seen before), and An Actor's Nightmare Book Four will be out later in the year. Beyond that, a wide variety of projects are planned.

Lastly, there is a rumor of a possible merger between An Actor's Nightmare and another online creative company that offers slightly different projects. This is by no means confirmed, but if it happens, it will be announced later this year. I won't go into details about what this would mean for AAN at this time, but it would be very exciting, and I promise to announce it here as soon as anything is confirmed, if it pans out.

Qops! (from A Prairie Home Companion)
Garrison Keillor: We come from people who brought us up to believe that life is a struggle, and if you should feel really happy, be patient: this will pass.

Lola Johnson: What if you die some day?
Garrison Keillor: I will die.
Lola Johnson: Don't you want people to remember you?
Garrison Keillor: I don't want them to be told to remember me.

And I'm Back

I have taken, recently, to posting several blogs at once and then just changing all of the dates and times so that it looks like I update my blog on a regular basis. I thought about doing that today, as if I haven't added a blog in two weeks, but I couldn't think of any entries to add, so you all get a brief reprieve. Next week may bring something different. The last couple of weeks have been very busy, finishing a semester at school, starting a new one, working two jobs, reading lots of Janet Evanovich books, watching Gilmore Girls with Amanda B., attending a concert wherein Nathan Haley performed, having drinks at bars with Sarah, seeing Spiderman 3, and watching season finales. Yet, I don't feel the need to write in length about all of that. Usually I do lots of television coverage on this blog, but that has probably changed almost permanently. Which is the topic of this week's blog.

Creatively, I have been branching out quite rapidly. The biggest news right now is The Good, The Bad, & The Geeky, a podcast available on iTunes or through Dribble for Kids. I cohost with my good friend Nick Arganbright. It is entertainment based, thus no need for me to write down all of that on here, as I already give my views in length in a public forum. We also read e-mails of listeners, talk movies, news, etc. We plan on doing an episode every other week or so, although we just did one yesterday and have plans to do one Saturday in a special Season Finale Spectacular two parter! If you didn't check out our previous podcast (The No Name Show), which was very irregular and unstructured, it is still available on iTunes, but this new one is drastically different.

Also, the issue I wrote for Dribble for Kids will begin appearing online in the not too distant future, An Actor's Nightmare Book 3 is still on schedule for a fall release, short stories have continued to appear on my web site (the most recent will be up within the week), and I plan to launch a series of sitcom scripts online in the fall, as if it were a real television show. Lots to keep me busy right now. Plus school, work, a possible move...

Stay tuned and I'll keep you updated!

Qop! (from The Simpsons: "24 Minutes" / 400th episode!)
(Jack Bauer) Chloe, I need those schematics now!
(Bart) Who is this?
(Jack) I'm Jack Bauer - who the hell are you?
(Bart) Me? I'm, uh, Ahmed Adoodie (pronounced "I Made a Doodie")
(Jack) Chloe, find out all you can about Ahmed Adoodie. Does anyone there know Ahmed Adoodie?
(Chloe) Ahmed Adoodie - wealthy Saudi financier. Disappeared into Afghanistan in the late '90s.
(Jack) Really?
(Chloe) No, Jack, it's a joke name. You're being set up!
(Jack) Dammit!

Great Weekend

What a fantastic weekend I had! I don't want to go into all of the details, because some things are just not for public consumption, but a big shout out to anyone I came into contact with that made this weekend so much fun: Diane, Sarah, Chris, Susie, Jonathan, Michael, Lisa, Mary, and all the rest. Big shout out to Jonathan. I have to admit, the first time I saw the show, during your first song my attention still kept getting drawn to Michael with his funny hijinks. This time I really paid attention to you, and you were so great, I can't even tell you. Brilliant performance. Twice as funny as last week's show. And of course, Lisa, Michael, and Mary. You were all still fantastic, too. It was awesome. Thank you so much. Can't wait for the next show. Also, a shout out to my mom's garage sale, which netted my personally over $100 from my old junk. Yay!

Qop!
"How many geese in a gaggle?" ~ Lisa as Philia in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum

Tip of the Hat, Wag of the Finger May 2007 Edition

TIP OF MY HAT TO CENTER STAGE PRODUCTIONS
For putting on A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, and at least half of the gay males in the cast actually acted straight!
WAG OF MY FINGER TO AXIS NIGHTCLUB
You make us sit on bar stools with no backs for over two hours to see the great CTP shows!!!
TIP OF MY HAT TO THE MAN
For always bringing me down and keeping my humble.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO ICE-CREAM
It certainly is delicious, isn't it?
TIP OF MY HAT TO JENNIFER HUDSON
For winning the Oscar, and now being available for my viewing pleasure on DVD.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO GREY'S ANATOMY
For introducing so many great new cast members for the spinoff. The last thing I need right now is another show to watch!!!
TIP OF MY HAT TO LOST
For bringing the naysayers back into the fold with your brilliant plot twists.
WAG OF MY FINGER TO LOST
For setting a cancellation date of spring 2009. That's cutting and running! Haven't you learned anything from our president??? Never set a timetable!!! Now the Others just have to sit back and wait until the show goes off the air to kill our heroes.
TIP OF MY HAT TO GHOSTS
Because once I pretended to be one and scared the shit out of my friend and it was HILARIOUS!!!
WAG OF MY FINGER TO EVOLUTION
If I'm so evolved, how come I can't get a date? :)

Qop!
Eh, I don't feel like doing one today. Sorry.

On Notice / Dead to Me #2

For loyal readers of this blog, you may remember that last September I announced my own Dead to Me and On Notice boards, modeled after my idol, Stephen Colbert. They have not been updated in nearly eight months, so now I present for your pleasure my new lists! Many of the names have been left, but the descriptions changes. As always, there can only be dead per board, so I will give a brief account at the bottom of who got off the list. Lucky bastards. You had better hope that you never make this list. New additions are *ed

ON NOTICE
*Jonathan Stewart (my friend) - I'm sorry, but it's getting confusing to know two people with that name, and The Daily Show's host isn't going to change his. You've got until I do my next update to resolve the situation.
President George W. Bush - You have been moved from "DtM" to "ON" because it's way past time to stop ignoring you. Stand up and impeach the bastard!
J. K. Rowling - You stay here because I haven't read your new book yet, which is only the second longest of the series. Why in the hell isn't it the longest?
Movie Critis - I used to complain about your bad reviews, but lately it seems all the reviews have been good. Find a middle ground!
*Girls - For continuing to not be interested in me. One day I am going to give up on you, and then you'll know what you're missing hos! :)
Bones - There was an episode pulled off the air because of the Virginia Tech coverage stuff, but that episode has apprently disappeared into thin air. What gives?
Fox - You cancelled Drive, but I hadn't watched it yet, so you're not "DtM"...for now.
*Alcohol - I need to lose some wait and you are getting in my way, delicious devil!
Clogs - They look so cool, and yet make my feet stink. Eh, why mess with a truism?
Geese - They are EVIL!!!! I won't make you dead to me, though, because you'll attack anyway and then I'll be dead. Like Bush, we can't afford to ignore them.

DEAD TO ME
Katie Couric - Hahaha. You switch lists because you're getting fired.
*Anna Nicole - Replacing Steven Irwin for the 'No, seriously. She's dead.'
Walmart - You axis of evil. You're an axis all by yourself. You're here forever.
Macs - I don't care how user friendly you are. I will NEVER own one of you! Maybe. Yep, no need to change this entry either.
*ABC & NBC - for not airing new episodes of Grey's Anatomy, My Name is Earl and The Office because of a little rain. I'll consider not watching any of your shows any more, but seriously, that was a prick thing to do and I hate you for it. I had to pay $1.99 an episode on iTunes!
Ashland Financial Aid Office - You continue to perplex me!
Grizzly Bears - Stephen hates you. Enough said.
The International Astonomers - Why hasn't Pluto been reinstated as a planet yet? Did you not hear the outcry of a mourning public?
The Food Service Industry - Still working there... Part time, but still...
Anyone Who Hasn't Bought My Book - WHY NOT???????

Repreives - Democrats. Yes, you won in November. But be careful or I'll put you right back! Iran, Condaleeza Rice, Steven Irwin and Mike DeWine were removed from the list because they are now under the Who Cares? category.

Death of The No Name Show

Few have heard of the fabled No Name Show, which made its appearance in early 2006, and occasionally delighted us with fifteen episodes over the past sixteen months, including six in the last couple of months alone. The radio show was intended to be like a morning show, hosted by Nick Nitro and Nathan Haley. From the start, Nathan had a bit of a hard time making the podcasts, and so the originally named 'Jimmy the Street Guy' often filled in as co-host. Wendy Webb took a turn or two when Nathan and Jimmy were both unavailable, and once Nick even did the show solo. Many times the show changed format and theme, and was often just rambling... But still, fifteen episodes were released, and no more will be forthcoming. I would recommend you go ahead and subsrcibe on iTunes, though, and download the full run of the show, which will probably still be available for some time, and invoke many chuckles. Highlights include when Nick was compared to Hitler during the Cat Vs. Dog battle, the various insults Jimmy suffered (especially when not present to defend himself), Nathan's distaste for anything good, and Wendy putting up with it with magnominity. For the final cast last night, all four cast members gathered for the first and last time on-air, along with a call-in guest, Paul, who told us all that we watch too much tv, and we agreed with him. It was a bittersweet hour, and a memorable one at that.

That being said, next Sunday, May 6, 2007 will be a pivotal date with the unveiling of a new program, much more structured, from Nick Nitro. The Good, The Bad, and The Geeky, co-hosted by Jimmy, and featuring a structure and schedule of entertainment news. There will be stories, important info, reviews, debates, guests, and tom foolerly. What's more, if you stay current with it, you will be informed of recording times and may call in and participate yourself! It will be a jovial time, and worth listening to, I'm sure. So sit tight gentle listeners, and prepare yourself for the first in what will probably be a series of Arganbright / Dailey joint projects, but more on that later. For now, listen!

Qop!
Let us share a moment of silence for the show that is no more, and not tarnish it with petty quotes.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum

It's time for the long awaited review of Center Stage Player's production of A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. It was FABULOUS!!! Incredibly hilarious! I cannot emphasize enough just how good it was. Yes, I do have friends in the show, but this isn't a biased review. They were also absolutely incredible. I loved it so much, I will probably go again next Friday. I would love to go on about every cast member, even the ones I am not friends with, but I forgot my program at the show and I don't remember all of their names. So instead, I'll just talk about my friends. But rest assured, this was a great show, and you should go buy tickets right now for Friday and Saturday's upcoming productions!
irst of all, a shout out to Evan, Paul, and Brianna, who kicked it up in the pit orchestra. It was great, guys. Mary Sink was Domina, the overbearing wife. She was deliciously wicked, and yet somehow a bit sympathetic in her control of Senex, her husband, who also performed fantastically. I giggled in glee at her angry rants. Props also to the actor who player Erroneous and his "third time around!" Then Jonathan Stewart in his macho turn as Miles Gloriosis blew me away. I actually believed he was straight. :) His ego ruled the stage, and even I found myself almost admiring the jerk. I saw the all important ending plot twist coming from a mile away, but I still reveled in every second he was on stage, trying to take the girl he rightfully brought.
Speaking of the girl, Philia was played wonderfully by Lisa Pruitt's boobs, er Lisa Pruitt. I'm sorry, but they were totally on display, and were practically the stars of the show for any straight man or lesbian woman. And who knew Lisa could capture the dumb blond who can never remember the difference between three and five so well? As the woman on whom the plot is based, I couldn't wait for Lisa to keep coming back on screen. I do have the mention the chief slave, Hysteria, whose name I forgot, for his part. It was awesome. I especially loved when he was pretending to be a dead Philia he was instructed to "Think Anna Nicole"
And the person who did the instructing? The shining star of the show, Michael Newsome. I do not wish to minimize the others contributions, because without a doubt, each of them performed outstandingly. But Michael was the star, and never had I expected him to rise to the occasion as well as he did. If you read my last review of this cast, you know how dazzled I was by his last part, but that was nothing compared to this one. As Psedulous (and Prologus), the slave who wants to be free, and barely controls the chaos of the story, Michael go to rant and rave and joke and trick and run all over the stage, playing with the audience, and being the perfect host. When he announced during the Prologue that it would take a superb, talented, etc, etc. actor to play the part of Psedulous, and then told us he was doing it, I laughed, and never stopped. Michael Newsome should have a career of acting, truthfully. I can't get over it. The Soothsayer scene may have been my favorite, but it's hard to tell with all of the great bits he had. Again, I urge you all very strongly to make time and see this show next weekend. You will not regret it.

Qops! (from A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum)
Pseudolus: Wait!
Hero: Yes?
Pseudolus: A brilliant idea!
Hero: Yes!
Pseudolus: That's what we need, a brilliant idea.

Senex: A word of advice: never fall in love during a total eclipse.

Lycus: Is it contagious?
Pseudolus: Have you ever seen a plague that wasn't?

Domina: Forgive me for ever having mistrusted you, my darling. But you HAVE been a little distant these past 29 years.

Miles Gloriosus: What is she like?
Pseudolus: A face so fair, a heart so pure - Sir, if you had been born a woman, you would have been she!
Miles Gloriosus: As magnificent as that?